Julie Is Not Lost

Yay! You're My FB Friend! Oh, Wait, Wait, Maybe Not...

2011-10-18T18:20:00.006-04:00

I am a reluctant participant of Facebook. A few years ago a friend of mine (we'll call her Kaylee) sent me an invite to sign up for the cult that is Facebook.

As what probably happens to everyone who joins, people start coming out of the woodwork, who seem to earnestly, desperately, want to be FB friends.

While some are people you legitimately know and fall under the category of "Oh, right, Jim, hey, I wondered what happened to him. It would be nice to catch up with him", many are people you had little or nothing in common with at the time, and now they JUST CANNOT WAIT to be your friend! Like that girl you were on the bowling league with 20 years ago, or a co-worker from eight jobs ago, or the cousin of a friend of the guy you went out with (yeah, I can't follow it, either).

But let's get back to Kaylee, that girl who roped into Facebook in the first place. Kaylee and I were friends, as in friends in the real world as opposed to friends in the Facebook world. We regularly exchanged emails, occasionally got together for coffee, and exchanged horror stories about our house renovations. But I'm finding that being friends in Facebook is a fickle, fickle thing: to quote Heidi Klum, "One day you're in, and the next day, you're OUT!"

Kaylee unceremoniously dumped me from Facebook. Yes-she dumped my sorry ass! Apparently she don't want to be friends no mo. And, yes, the irony of the Facebook initiator morphing into the one who unfriended me is not lost on me.

Then I noticed others that dumped me: a friend from the cult college I went to. Yep, he friended me, only to unfriend me. Was it the stories I posted from those liberal rags slate.com or salon? Was it my snarky remarks about, well, everything? Or did he just decide he didn't really like me after all and didn't want anything to do with me? Well, I guess I'll never know, because that's what happens when you get FB dumped. It's a cruel, cruel thing, or a very funny thing, depending on how you look at it. I think you can guess what camp I stand in.

I have to scratch my head over this form of buyer's remorse, Facebook style: let's 1) do a search to find people you know on Facebook, then 2) send a Facebook request, next 3) become friends on Facebook, then, 4) unfriend them. Yes, in retrospect this does make perfect sense--if we were all in the fourth grade again!

My theory on Facebook is that for many people, it's a way to get attention, not really to share noteworthy news, but rather a play to garner sympathy. When you post about being miserable six months after your boyfriend dumps you, or say "I'm a loser and I'll never find a job" you can practically write the posts FB friends are going to write: "oh, GF, you are so smart I just KNOW there's a great job out there" or "Jennie, you need to FORGET about that loser and get out there and find someone else!" Those comments are really helpful, aren't they?

Telling the truth like "well, you did kind of major in anthropology and yeah, it's going to be next to impossible finding a job that doesn't involve a nametag and your saying 'do you want fries with that'", apparently, this is not part of being a good Facebook friend. In fact, that'll probably get you on the fast track to unfriend-ville each and every time.

If I were a really insecure person, I'd be wringing my hands and emailing Kaylee and my college friend Peter (not his real name) or my former co-worker Lulu Belle (obviously not her real name) and everyone else who friended and then unfriended me. What went wrong? Why don't you like me any more? Why did you dump me on Facebook?! I thought we were friends! I thought you liked me! But really, who cares? Be my friend, not be my friend on Facebook. There.

The Order of the Hand Will Rule!

2011-05-10T18:28:00.006-04:00

A section of my street is closed due to construction. And using your GPS to get to my house will put you face to face with a big "Road Closed" sign. Your GPS and all of its high tech technology will literally get you nowhere.

So my guests have had to resort to--gasp--actual maps. And it's not going well. Have we gotten so moronic that we can't get anywhere unless some disembodied Stepford Wife on the GPS says in a semi-coo, "turn right onto Main Street".

The whole thing reminds me of a sketch on Saturday Night Live. Will Ferrell and Nancy Walls are Oliver and Diane, the co-hosts (w/ David Alan Grier as Weatherman Tim) of "Wake Up and Smile!", one of those regional Good Morning America knock-offs.

The wheels on this vehicle come off as soon as their teleprompter breaks and they are literally at a loss for words. After a few fumbled exchanges:

Oliver: "The teleprompter on which everything we say appears on...is broken!"
Diane: "Please! Let's get that teleprompter fixed!"

the three of them turn from panic to a variation of Lord of the Flies:

Oliver: "We will live! WE WILL LIVE!!!!!" [cuts to commercial, then back from commercial, the set is on fire, Oliver's shirtless and a hand symbol is painted on his chest]
"The order of the hand will rule us!"
Tim: "But what if the box still refuses to give us words?"
Oliver: "You challenge my authority?!"
Tim: "I smell from your scent that you are weak. I challenge you!"

[a scuffle ensues, Oliver emerges with Tim's severed head]

Oliver: "The weatherman is DEAD! I KILLED the weatherman! His strength is in me!"

Then of course the teleprompter is fixed and there's nothing more awkward than holding your dead co-worker's head by the hair! Oopsie!

While as far as I know, none of my guests have resorted to cannibalism, they've made it a whole lot more difficult than it needs to be.

On Sunday, after giving a guest directions by email, her Pittsburgh contact directions by email, no one could either follow them or bother to get them out and read them. The guest's driver called in a panic, "I'm on 44th Street and it's closed! How do I get to your house?" I gave her directions to complete the 2 minute drive to my house.

Thirty minutes later they still didn't show up. I called them, and the guest, sounding very annoyed, said "We are on your street and there is a big "road closed" sign and don't know where to go." This time, I navigated the aforementioned very put out guest to my house.

Her driver, of course, did not know how to get to the theater for the event they were going to. I drew them a map (literally two turns to get there) and sent them on their way. Fifteen minutes later the guest is back, handing her keys to me.

"Your location is too far away and there are just too many detours," she said. "I'm going to stay with a friend."

Um, okay.

Yesterday I had another guest coming in for the same event and it was Groundhog Day all over again. This time, his GPS directions weren't helping him! This guy, who from what I understand is a world traveler and lives in New York City, is too freaked out to drive his rental car to the same theater (you know, the one that it takes two turns to get to from my house?) so he's got this poor girl carting him around.

Last night, he tells me, they returned around 2:00 in the morning and he couldn't get his key to work! He's in a panic -- what can he do? Should he call me to help him figure out how to work the deadbolt?

Turns out Einstein wasn't even at my house -- he was at one down the street (I suspect some cocktails were involved, no?). He's lucky we don't live in NRA territory, or I suspect trying to use a key to enter a house that doesn't belong to you may be cause for justifiable homicide.

This Sunday the worst direction follower on the planet is coming to my house: my dad. Now, despite the fact that my parents have been coming to this house for well over 15 years and the detour involves going up a street they've traveled for 15 years, how much do you want to bet that they will somehow end up downtown?

My Dad: "44th Street is closed - there's a big "Do not enter" sign there! So we kept going straight and then I saw the Convention Center and knew we'd gone too far!"

Pray for me, people, pray for me!

What "Wii" Really Care About

2011-03-16T10:58:00.006-04:00

I've come to the conclusion that we Americans, for the most part, are stupid, selfish, and self-centered. Sure, we respond to a natural disaster halfway around the world with aching hearts and open checkbooks. However, the real elephant in the room is that Japan is on the brink of a meltdown, not just with six dying nuclear reactors, but in every sense of the word.

I'm not suggesting that everyone run the streets in panic, but people, this is the worst nuclear disaster in history, with its effect long-term and far reaching. Am I the only one that's a little panicky about this?

I'm not demeaning the suffering the Japanese people are experiencing now, because of the earthquake and tsunami. But--how about a lifetime of radiation sickness and a generation or two radiation-inducing cancer? How about a country that could be on the brink of economic collapse? Citizens whose reality could be where electricity is a luxury, fleeting in a world of rolling blackouts and power cuts.

The only person I've seen on TV that said out loud all of the things I've been thinking about the power reactor disaster is CNN guest commentator Jim Walsh. The veins nearly popped out of his head when he heard the news that the "Fukushima 50" (my phrase, catchy, huh?) had abandoned the six reactors and the first person I heard talk about the IAEA and its involvement--or non-involvement--in this situation.

Who's the IAEA? The International Atomic Energy Agency is a non-partisan, international organization that promotes, monitors, and oversees all things nuclear. They're the ones that look into whispered rumors about nuclear weaponry and are tasked to look into "mishaps" at nuclear power plants.

If you want to read something truly disturbing, read the news updates provided by the IAEA's web site. Tokyo Electric Power Company (TEPCO), the private company that runs the Fukushima power plants, has a long and rich history of distorting the truth, covering up the truth, and omitting the truth. Between 2002 and 2005, these reactors were shut down as a result of TEPCO falsifying safety records.

Yet despite TEPCO's extremely spotty safety record and their history of lying about safety, it has been permitted to handle this situation without the direct, on-site involvement of the IAEA. TEPCO/Fukushima reported to the IAEA on March 13th that Reactor #3 was "in a safe, cold shutdown" and that other reactors were "under control". Yet 48 hours later, they were reporting fires, exposed fuel rods, and asked IAEA to send an envoy, which IAEA reported that they have done. Yet at this point, it's a bit like closing the barn door after the animals have escaped: what, realistically, can the IAEA do at this point to help the situation?

With the Fukushima 50 fleeing at approximately 9:00 p.m. EST yesterday, one has to question Fukushima's statements not 48 hours prior. Can a reactor truly be "safe and cold" and less than 48 hours later, be on the brink of a meltdown?

It should be noted that power plants are recognized to have a life capacity of approximately 40 years, when the integrity of certain materials in the plants comes into question. Yet just last month, Japanese regulators granted an extension of ten years for the continued operation of these reactors, which range in age from 36 to 40 years old.

Some reactors cores and spent fuel rod compartments are being cooled using sea water, which CNN expert Walsh reported was a "last ditch effort" to extinguish fires and keep key areas cool. Certainly salty water in a concrete structure is not going to help maintain the integrity of the structure.

But how else can Japan provide electricity for its residents? The country does not have its own supply of natural resources, such as coal, natural gas, or oil. It does not have vast amounts of land that could be used to create a hydroelectric dam. Wind power and solar power are viable sources of electricity, but could not create sufficient power (at least not at the present time) to electrify a country of millions.

The likelihood is that all six of the Fukushima power plants will remain off-line and will have to be de-commissioned. Will the build new reactors (and will the IAEA allow them to do so)? And in the meantime, how will the country survive with limited electrical power? How will this affect manufacturing production?

A new Japan is going to have to emerge from this crisis: one less reliant on electricity, at least until new power plants are built. Energy will have to be diverted to manufacturing facilities and key infrastructure, to help keep commerce going, maintain order in the country, and to avoid going into the next disaster: an economy in a quick and deadly downward spiral. And while Americans feel this sympathy towards the Japanese people now, I predict that this sympathy will quickly turn to anger and frustration when little Billy can't get his new electronic toy or Tommy can't get a new flashy computer. Because it's really all about us, isn't, it?

Secret Paean to DePalma Movie?

2011-02-10T17:57:00.007-05:00

Does anyone remember the movie from 1984 called "Body Double"? Written and directed by horror/suspense genre genius Brian DePalma, it's the story of Jake. Jake is an actor and has been toiling in supporting roles for years. Now comes his big break: the lead in a horror movie.

But Jake has a problem, an acute case of claustrophobia. While under ordinary circumstances, he can keep his phobia under control (and under wraps), a major scene in the movie forces him to face his phobia head on: where his vampire character has to climb into (and out of) a coffin.

At the crucial moment, he freezes, paralyzed by his claustrophobia. The director doesn't understand Jake's dilemma and goes into a fury, talking about the time and money that this is costing. The director intimates that he had "better get his act together" or risk getting re-cast, a/k/a his big break.

Jake is having issues at home, too: having caught his girlfriend in bed with someone else, he needs to find another place to live. He quickly finds a new, swanky place to live in the Hollywood Hills by way of a fellow actor, Sam, who befriends him in an acting workshop.

What follows is a hallucinatory journey led by Sam into a world of voyeurism, the pornography industry, and lots of interesting characters and such outrageous gore (a woman getting stabbed to death by a giant drill) that it's difficult to say what's real and what's imagined.

Or - what's staged. Toward the end of the movie, Jake is involved in a footchase with a bunch of gun-toting bad guys when he trips and falls into a large hole. Sam is soon there, offering Jake the handle of a shovel. "Just grab the handle," Sam yells, "I'll pull you up." But Jake has claustrophobia, remember? But if he can't get himself out of this hole, the bad guys will soon find him and kill him.

In this literal do-or-die moment, Jake overcomes his claustrophobia, grabs the handle, and is lifted out of the hole, which morphs into a coffin (Jake's back on the set of his movie), where he lifts the lid of the coffin, says his line, and the pleased director yells "Cut!"

You think that's the end of the movie, but then the camera pans around to show some people on the set, people who really shouldn't be there: his "friend" Sam, porn star Holly Body. You realize that only the beginning and the ending of this movie is "real": the sudden appearance of Sam and his luxury home, his neighbor who stripteases in front of the window, the "murder" of this neighbor, it was all fake. Fake! Merely a set up, a long con if you will, to put Jake in a situation where he had to experience a life-or-death situation that would put him face to face with his claustrophobia.

Why am I mentioning this movie? Yes, why, Julie, other than a trip down memory lane? Because after watching "Black Swan", it seems like the same long con could be taking place to dancer Nina.

This storyline should start to sound familiar: Nina is a dancer, who has toiled away as a member of dance troupe but never given the lead. However, her luck changes when the Company Director awards the lead of Swan Lake to Nina. However, Nina has a problem: while she dances perfectly, she dances mechanically, without passion, without losing control. In order to succeed at Swan Lake, Nina must explore--and embrace--her dark side.

On the day that the announcement is made, a new dancer arrives to the Company, Lily. Lily is everything Nina is not: one might say a yin to Nina's yang. Where Nina is technically perfect, Lily is a free spirit personified, dancing from her heart instead of her head.

What follows is a hallucinatory journey led by Lily into a world of designer drugs, sex, and such outrageous gore (a woman getting stabbed to death by shards of a mirror) that it's difficult to say what's real and what's imagined.

Finally, it is the night of the premiere, but all of these obstacles get placed at her feet. Nina's mother locks Nina in her room, telling her daughter that she's gone ahead and told the Company that Nina cannot perform due to illness. When Nina escapes her room and arrives at the theater, the Company Director tells her she cannot perform, it's too late. But nothing is going to stop Nina, nothing!

In the first act (White Swan), Nina catches Lily in the wings, making out with Nina's co-lead, the Swan Prince. Then, after this co-lead drops her in an uncharacteristic fumble, Lily (conveniently, her understudy) appears in her dressing room and the following exchange occurs:

Lily: A rough start, huh? Must have been pretty humiliating.
Nina: Get out of my room!
Lily: Gee, I'm just worried about the next act. I'm not sure you're feeling up to it.
Nina: Stop. Please stop!
Lily: How about I dance the black swan for you?

How's that for spurring someone on? When Nina appears on stage for Act Two--the Black Swan--the question is whether or not she can free herself of her phobia, her need to be perfect, lose control, and embrace her shadow side?

Well, the answer is yes and no. Nina does dance an incredible, amazing, Black Swan. However, unlike Jake, who was able to face his phobia and triumph, Nina takes the metamorphosis too far, losing control not only of her quest for perfection but her very sanity. She appears to have a total, psychotic break from reality, ending up literally becoming the Black Swan, complete with a suicide at the end.

So was the middle of this movie, like Body Double, just one big long con to get someone to face his or her fears and see his or her full potential? I say yes. It just seems to be too many coincidences for this not to be staged.

Let's review the "conspirators". Her overprotective (to the point of smothering) mother, a former dancer, only wants the triumph and success she never had. She'll stop at nothing to get her daughter the lead, vicariously basking in the glow of Nina's success.

The Company Director, having just retired his last prima ballerina, is eager to begin grooming a new protegee, and while having reservations, thinks Nina may just fit the bill.

Lily, the free spirit, is in a no-win situation: she'll conspire to push Nina toward triumph (may see this as a bit of fun, a departure from the otherwise stuffy and rarefied world of ballet). But Lily is in a position to come out ahead if Nina stumbles, because she's been named the understudy.

Black Swan Darren Aronofsky has stated that he is a fan of Brian DePalma. The question is, is Black Swan his paean to his director idol?

This Year's Emmys ROCKED!

2010-08-30T11:42:00.010-04:00

The Emmys were last night and if I had to sum up this year's show in one word, it would be surprising. They were chock full of award upsets, unexpected performers, well-placed cameos, and almost completely devoid of bloat (okay, the middle section got a little boring, but I digress).

A tip o' the hat to the writers, producers, and host of this year's Emmys - Jimmy Fallon. The stage was set (so to speak) and the bar set high with an opening number featuring Bruce Springsteen's classic, "Born to Run". The sketch included not only Fallon and the Glee cast, but also Tina Fey, Betty White, Jon Hamm, Joel McHale, and...Jorge Garcia (!), all singing and shaking their money makers.

But don't just take my word for it - check out the sketch yourself.

Cameos ruled the night and were used effectively. The funniest one featured a faux conversation with the cast of Modern Family and the show's producer, who was pitching ideas of how to "spice up" the show. After a few suggestions were nixed, one that received a big thumbs up: When Phil dies, his widow Claire hooks up with Phil's dishy brother, played by none other than George Clooney. Shortly afterward, several "accidents" occur, with Gloria claiming George Clooney as her own (photo, above), and eventually George Clooney ends up in bed with--you guessed it--gay couple Cam and Mitchell.

There was no monologue, but Jimmy Fallon did very short guitar riffs where he introduced each section of the award show: comedy, drama, mini-series or movie, and reality. He got people in the audience to sing with him, including Amy Poehler, Kim Kardashian (not a bad singer!), Julianna Margulies, and Steve Colbert.

He parodied Elton John, among others in a send-off for shows leaving the air. The inside, inside joke that probably only diehard LOST fans know is that Matthew "Foxy" Fox and Billie Joe Armstrong of Green Day are very good friends. Apparently Jimmy Fallon also knows this (or it was a VERY freaky coincidence) because for his send-off to LOST, Jimmy dressed up as Billie Joe and sang his version of Green Day's "Time of My Life" (photo, left).

Onstage, the presenters kept the banter short and for the most part witty. Co-presenters Jon Hamm and Betty White talked about their "sexual chemistry", with Betty hinting that things other than clothes got swapped in the changing area after the opening number.

The best presenter was my boy Ricky Gervais (slimmed down and looking, I have to say, quite hot), who very nearly stole the show with his banter. Amongst his riffs, one on Mel Gibson: "I'm not gonna have a go at him. He's been through a lot. [Pause] Not as much as the Jews, though." After he talked about his inability to get a beer backstage, he offered the entire audience a beer (The Office just went into syndication, drinks are on me, he explained). Waiters carrying longnecks on silver trays appeared out of nowhere and passed out drinks. Among those slugging back a cold one? Christine Baranski!

While shows like LOST and Glee garnered lots of nominations, LOST was shut out (a shande, a shande, I say!) and Glee was only 2 for 19, getting wins for actress Jane Lynch and directing for co-creator Ryan Murphy.

Amongst other surprises/upsets: Top Chef beat out perennial favorite Amazing Race for best reality show and Big Bang Theory Sheldon Parsons won over favored to win Steve Carrell for The Office. Perhaps the biggest surprise was Breaking Bad actor Aaron Paul grabbing an Emmy over the two-way horse race of Michael Emerson and Terry O'Quinn, both favored to win for LOST. I'm thinking that two LOST actors on the ballot split the vote, allowing Paul to win. That's my story and I'm sticking to it!

The show kept a brisk pace and the only section that seemed to drag were the awards for Mini-Series or Movie (mainly because I had never seen nor heard of most of them). Winners kept their speeches short and Al Pacino was the only one that seemed to ramble. But that, like using insipid Twitter comments to introduce presenters, were minor missteps and didn't ruin an otherwise entertaining and memorable evening.

Tomorrow: the fashions! :)

Sorry - I lack the proper equipment to perform that function

2010-07-15T14:25:00.005-04:00

What I am not, sadly

I've been called a lot of things: genius, sexy, charismatic--oh, wait, that was a dream I once had--anyway, one thing I never have been and never will claim to be is psychic. Psycho, perhaps (you'll certainly get confirmation about this from anyone who has dated me or known me for more than 15 minutes), but psychic? Never.

So why, why, why does everyone and their brother think I'm a mind reader? Just to clear up any confusion on the matter, let me say, for the record, I am neither a psychic nor a mind reader. I don't keep Tarot cards in my purse, there's no crystal ball being utilized in my house. Hell, I don't even wear black, flowing gowns and dance around like Stevie Nicks (although I don't think she's a psychic, either, she just enjoys dressing up like one).

Whee! Do a twirl, Stevie!

I seemed to have jinxed myself with my last post with the whole guest feedback thing. Maybe guests read it and decided not to tell big, bad Julie anything because I might spontaneously combust. Or yell and scream. Or--actually fix the problem.

Am I really that threatening a presence (don't answer that)? To wit: I sent out an email to friends and former guests about the upgrades and improvements I've made to the property: the new flatscreen, private baths for everyone, etc.

This has opened the floodgate for former guests to complain about something wrong with their stay -- months after the fact. Mind you, these were all things that could be fixed if I had known there was a problem: how to turn off a light, work the TV remote, set the alarm clock, lock the door, etc.

I try to cover questions in the tour I give at check-in, I leave a notebook in guest rooms with answers to frequently asked questions. But of course people forget what I said during the tour, don't read the FAQ's, and it's impossible to cover everything. So I tell people how to reach me, 24 hours a day, and encourage them to tell me if nothing is wrong.

This has been quite a wake-up call for me, because I had no idea what an imposing, scary presence I had. I missed my calling -- I should have been a repo man, or a bouncer, or maybe even a WWE wrestler!

Four guests who left nice notes about what a nice time they had have now had an epiphany: oh, maybe I didn't have such a good time. Now that I think about it, that stupid TV remote didn't work right! I couldn't figure out how to turn off the hallway light and I didn't get any sleep! I couldn't get the DVD to eject out of the machine! I stand corrected: your place sucks and I want a refund!

So as much as I bitched in my last post about Mr. & Mrs. Overbearing and their constant complaining, I will give them props for opening their pieholes during their stay and telling me what was wrong--or what they thought was wrong.

However, I now think the people that are more annoying are the ones who are all smiles during their stay--then find a litany of complaints after they check out. Well I have news for you: if you can't figure out how to use your larynx while you're here and give me a chance to fix the problem, there's nothing I can do weeks after you stayed here, is there? Sheesh!

Now you know why I went into the innkeeping business: I'm a real people person!

Guess you gave me your [fifty] two cents' worth

2010-06-19T19:08:00.006-04:00

I normally don't complain about guests--99% of the time, they are nice, normal, decent people just looking for an affordable place to stay. Some guests I've hosted multiple times, and a few I now consider to be my friends. All in all, not a bad way to make a living.

But this week I had a group of guests I won't soon forget. The parents, who I'll call Mr. and Mrs. Overbearing, confessed that when they owned a turn-of-the-century home ("much nicer than this one, dear," Mrs. Overbearing whispered), they considered turning it into a bed and breakfast.

In their minds, thinking of operating a B&B and actually doing it were one in the same. I realize that my B&B is not perfect, but here are a few kernels of wisdom they passed my way:

"Did you realize you have a HUGE butterfly bush in your backyard?" roared Mr. Overbearing. "It needs to be SIGNIFICANTLY pruned or CUT DOWN ALTOGETHER. Where are your pruning shears? Let's go out and do it RIGHT NOW!"

"How old are your smoke detectors? Oh, really, you don't know. Well, I was speaking to [Mr. Overbearing] and he noticed that they were pretty old. Do they function? Oh, they do? Well, [Mr. Overbearing] thinks that they aren't safe. This is an old house and we don't feel SAFE. We don't think we'll be able to sleep tonight. The house may BURN DOWN! What? No, you don't have to go out and get a new one RIGHT NOW. I just am worried that you might LOSE your house because of this old smoke detector. [Mr. Overbearing] just mentioned that he didn't know how SOUNDLY he could sleep because of this...SITUATION. Oh, you're going to the store? Well, if you think that's best." - Mrs. Overbearing

"You have run out of a GREAT MANY things upstairs--are you aware of that? You really should keep your pantry more stocked!! What? You store things downstairs? Well, I didn't know that, dear. I put together a list of things that we are COMPLETELY out of and desperately NEED. Yes, we did find the extra [four] rolls of toilet paper under the sink. But there are FOUR people using that bathroom and we just WENT THROUGH THEM [in two days' time]. So here's the list - it's RATHER extensive. You can use that when you go to the store today." - Mrs. Overbearing

[pounding on the bathroom door] "Julie? Julie!! JULIE! JULIE!! JULIE!!! Oh, I didn't realize you were in the shower. I guess it can wait." - Mr. Overbearing

Then there was their son, older than me, and about as responsible--and obnoxious--as a fourth grader. He had told me he and his business associate would be checking in around midnight. At 12:30, my phone rings and they've lost both set of directions to the house. I don't know if they were drunk, or tired, or a bit of both, but they both thought it was hysterical when they did things like a) miss their exit, b) go straight when they were supposed to turn, c) get incredibly lost and then say "Oh, there's a street sign. Oh, it's too dark, I can't read what it says. But there was a gas station at the intersection." They pulled into my house at 1:52 a.m., giggly and falling all over each other. It was hysterical!

There wasn't enough things I could do for them: find them a dry cleaner (and provide directions), find them a thrift store (ditto on directions), a rug store, BOGO vouchers for area attractions (none of which they used), get them directions to the Expo Mart, Mount Washington, Downtown, South Hills Village, the airport, Mount Washington to the airport, Monroeville to South Hills Village, Airport to New York, Lawrenceville to New York, Mt. Washington to New York. After printing out directions for what had to be the fifth time to the Expo Mart, it took all restraint within me not to staple them onto the son's forehead.

I don't normally ask for a tip, but in the case of guests that I feel I've gone above and beyond, I have an envelope I leave in case people want to leave me a little something.

Today, (checking out two hours past check-out time) the little darlings left my house. What was in the envelope? Two quarters and two pennies. All I can say is that it's really too bad I saw this after their car drove away, because I've been known to have a pretty lethal throw...

What...A Brat

2010-04-29T19:40:00.008-04:00

In 1992, Saturday Night Live featured a "Wayne's World" sketch comparing the Gore daughters (schwing!) to Chelsea Clinton ("not a fox").

It was reported that the Clinton's, particularly Hillary Clinton, was furious with SNL for what she considered to be "cruel and disrespectful" remarks towards her daughter (interestingly not a peep, though, from the Gore camp about "Wayne" saying their daughters were babes). The comments made in the sketch? Essentially that Chelsea was not an attractive girl. I'll let you be the judge.

Fast forward nearly twenty years, and little Chelsea is all grown up and engaged to be married this year. In what has to be the definition of irony, the now-swan Chelsea had a request of her father: lose weight.

I wouldn't have believed this story unless I had seen multiple articles reporting that Clinton relayed this story at a fiscal summit in DC. Not only did Chelsea basically call her Dad a pork-o, she demanded he lose 15 pounds. Or else what? He not walk her down the aisle? He not have the privilege of paying for the whole bloody wedding?

It's no secret that Bill Clinton has had an issue with poor diet and a struggle with weight. But his 2004 heart surgery appeared, at least to me, to put him on a good path. He lost a tremendous amount of weight and reported following a more healthy diet and exercise plan. Looking at recent pictures of him, it would be hard to categorize him as overweight.

If I were Bill Clinton, I'd tell Chelsea to go eff herself, drive myself to the nearest Burger King, and order a Triple Whopper Sandwich with Cheese and Mayo, named by Men's Health Magazine as the worst fast food burger out there. Bon Appetit!

Good Manners Never Gave Me Eight Million Dollars

2010-04-01T18:00:00.006-04:00

Sunday is my favorite day of the week: a luxurious and lazy several hours sipping coffee, reading the paper, and doing the crossword puzzles. But alas, my respite was interrupted by my blood boiling after reading the profile piece on the Development Director over at the Pittsburgh Opera, John Federico. Federico, who, given his work history at many prestigious nonprofit's, clearly knows how fundraising works.

Which makes it all the more infuriating when he glibly distilled successful fundraising into one completely ludicrous soundbyte:

"...he believes his job really comes down to this: Say please and thank you [emphasis added]. At least that's what he tells aspiring young interns.

'If you're going to be a fundraiser and if your parents raised you right, you really should know the most important things to say by the time you're 5. If you can do those things, the rest is all polish.'"

Really, John, really? Successful fundraising comes down simply to having good manners?

If the absolute key to fundraising could be found in something so simple, every nonprofit in town would have pots overflowing with money. Hell, my parents raised me pretty well, and I am the champion thank you note writer, but somehow that prevented the nonprofit I started from swimming in money.

Mr. Federico and I both know that the secret to fundraising is not good manners. While Elsie Hillman might certainly appreciate a heartfelt thank you directed her way, that, my friend, will take you only so far. Successful fundraising relies many different things. If I had to choose one thing that will get you to the front of the proverbial pack, it's connections. No, make that relevant connections.

Connections and relationships are the key to fundraising. You need a board of directors, preferably ones with deep pockets, who know people who are connected and/or have deep pockets, who are articulate and enthusiastic and energetic who will sell, sell, sell your organization at every opportunity to anyone and everyone who could possibly get you money, positive exposure, or both.

You need to be a nonprofit that not only has a good reputation in the market, but one with a demonstrated track record amongst funders. It's like getting your first job: employers want experience, but to get experience you need to get a job. Getting that first grant is tough (from someone who started a nonprofit you'll have to trust me on this one), and it certainly helps to have a connected BOD or Executive Director, or--even better--someone you know at the philanthropic organization that's doling out the money.

Once you get connections, you have to constantly cultivate that relationship. Put them on your mailing list, invite them to events, take them out to lunch to get their thoughts about the organization, and make them feel like (I hate this word, but here it's applicable) a stakeholder. In short, make them feel included, and it's constant and ongoing, and way, way beyond a simple "please" and "thank you".

These days, it's increasingly difficult to get money, as even Federico admits. I give myself only a "C", because it's not my forte and success fundraising is really an art, based on a perfect storm of a lot of different factors. Maybe Federico's comments were meant to be self-effacing, but he knows as well as I do that a simple please and thank you alone aren't going to do it.

Academy Awards Wrap-Up

2010-03-08T18:36:00.020-05:00

Last night was the Oscars and as far as awards shows go, it was fairly predictable. This year the night was co-hosted by Steve Martin and Alec Baldwin (making their own fashion statement in a Snuggie, right).

Martin and Baldwin did an okay job at co-hosting, their camaraderie seemed forced at times. Tina Fey and Robert Downey, Jr. stole the show when they co-presented an award for writing: Fey represented the writers ("What does a writer look for an actor? Memorizing, not fear of improving") and Downey the actors ("It's a collaboration between handsome gifted people and sickly little mole people").

The only real surprise as awards go--and it was a minor one--was the Hurt Locker getting Oscars for Best Picture and Best Direction over front runner Avatar. Most of the speeches were fairly vanilla, except for Sandra Bullock, who has gained a reputation over this awards season for memorable speeches. In her speech, after recognizing her co-nominees and thanking the family upon which the Blind Side was based, she thanked "[the] moms who take care of the babies, no matter where they came from" and tearfully dedicated it to her mother, who died a few years ago of cancer.

I don't know about you, but despite warning winners to keep the speeches short, the producers need to take their own advice and trim the show. This year I would have omitted the opening number with Neal Patrick "Doogie" Harris, cut or trimmed the tribute to John Hughes (the way they went on, you would have thought Martin Scorsese died), and the singing and dance number for the nominated songs. The show ran over by quite a bit, bringing the total show to a bloated three hours and thirty minutes.

But the fashions--what an improvement from the Golden Globes! Nearly everyone did a fantastic job, especially the men (Ryan Reynolds and Tom Ford especially).

First the leading actress nominees:Sandra Bullock shone in a gold lame sheath dress with a lace bodice. Normally for a formal event such as this, I'm a big fan of the updo, but she wore her hair long and sleek, with a slight wave and it looked fantastic.

It is hard to believe Helen Mirren is in her sixties and she looked beautiful in a pale sequined sheath with sheer sleeves.

Like Bullock, Gabby Sidibe also wore her hair down and slightly curled and looked beautiful in a flowing Marchesa gown of blue chiffon crepe.

Carey Mulligan's gamine hair reminded me of Mia Farrow in the 60's and I give her points for wearing a fashion-forward black Prada, but the gown didn't work for me. The bodice and waistline was festooned with lots and lots of crystal and embellished doo-dahs, including miniature scissors (yeah, I didn't get it either) and the shortened hemline in the front wasn't working.

Finally, Meryl Streep glowed in a low-cut soft white jersey gown, complemented with flawless make-up and a sophisticated upsweep. White jersey is very difficult to wear and the 59 year old (!) rocked it.

Supporting actress nominees: Anna Kendrick wore a dusky pale pink Ellie Saab gown that worked with her pale skin and her soft updo with tendrils gave it a very Edwardian, romantic look.

Mo'Nique wore a draped and rouched strapless gown in a bright blue. And while I appreciated the gardenia as a tribute to Hattie McDaniel, I thought it didn't quite go with the gown.

Vera Farmiga wore a bold red dress that seemed to swallow her up. It was a beautifully constructed dress, but I would have liked much better if there were fewer pleated ruffles.

Another actress that chose red was Penelope Cruz, in a strapless burgundy draped dress with a slightly asymetrical bodice that gave a modern spin on a classic style.

Maggie Gyllenhall's hair and make-up was stunning, and while her gown fit beautifully on her, but I thought the abstract blue print was too informal.

Presenters and attendees: Queen Latifah gets an A+ in a perfectly fitted pink duchess satin gown with a row of crystal embellishments that complemented the gown, and Zoe Kravitz (daughter of Lisa Bonet and Lenny Kravitz) looked like a dewy ingenue in a strapless gown in crimson and pale pink.

Finally, some disappointments: Zoe Saldana, a gorgeous girl wearing an unfortunate gown choice, Charlize Theron, usually a spot-on fashionista in a misstep here, and Sarah Jessica Parker in a strange Chanel gown with way, way too big hair.

Until next awards season, that's a wrap!

Where the Wild Things Are

2010-03-02T11:37:00.008-05:00

When you get right down to it, there are really only two kinds of animals: wild animals and domesticated animals. Wild animals live on their own in their natural habitat while domesticated animals allow humans to live with them (at least that's what my cat tells me).

What I don't understand is why everyone is so dumbstruck over the death of Dawn Brancheau, a trainer at a Florida Sea World that was recently killed by a killer whale. I'm not minimizing this incident because the death of Brancheau is tragic, but it raises the question of whether it could have been preventable and the whole idea of trying to train and domesticate wild animals.

As the story of Brancheau's death and the killer whale (named Tilikum) in question unfolds, some disturbing details are emerging. According to published reports, this may very well have been an accident waiting to happen. Reports tie a total of three deaths to Tilikum over the last two decades, and yet this animal was permitted to participate in shows like the one at Sea World. Individuals in attendance for the morning performance featuring the killer whale reported that the whale seemed irritated and agitated, balking at performing tricks.

While Sea World reports that they will not allow trainers in the water with whales, the former head of animal training at Sea World has already rendered his own verdict on what happened: blame the trainer.

Yep, the fact that this animal has been a) plucked from its natural habitat, b) kept in a confined space, c) been forced to perform and do tricks had nothing to do with the trainer's death. In no way does the fact that this animal's hard-wired physiology makes it a killer. No, that has nothing to do with it. Right.

It is amazing that, with lots of training and conditioning, a person can train an animal to perform tricks with a flourish of a hand. But regardless of the relationship these trainers have--and how seemingly conditioned they are, or as real a bond as they've formed with their human caretakers--they are still a wild animal. You just can't erase thousands of years of evolution and change an animal into something it's not.

If you need further proof of this, Sigfried and Roy are a perfect example. These two men dedicated decades to the breeding and raising of Siberian tigers. By all accounts, men and beast co-habitated together amenably. But for a split second during a performance, a female tiger performing was triggered--by a sound, by a gesture, by something--and attacked and nearly killed Roy.

Even so-called domesticated animals can attack and kill. There seem to be regular reports about a dog attacking and mauling someone, in some cases without provocation. If we can't prevent what we consider domesticated animals from attacking, how can we expect wild animals?

Unfortunately, Las Vegas shows, attractions like Sea World, and even the circus are huge, money-making machines. I predict that Sea World will have its investigation, pronounce their training methods and animals as "safe" and the show--and all the revenue it generates--will go on.

But I can guarantee you that deaths like Brancheau will continue, because you just can't take the wild out of a wild animal--no matter how many fish treats you give it.

I Heart Ricky

2010-01-29T14:30:00.015-05:00

Ricky Gervais, that is. Ricky presided over the Golden Globes this year and did a very good job. There were no dancing numbers, no superfluous tributes, no fluff, none (the Oscars could take a cue from how these awards are run). I love Ricky Gervais and his cheeky humor and was bowled over by the ad preceding awards night.

And Ricky was funny--schilling his DVD's (The Office, The Invention of Lying), all while guzzling from a glass of beer (hidden on a shelf in the podium, right). "Hey, everyone else is out there [in the audience] getting drunk, why shouldn't I?", he retorted at one point, as he took an especially big gulp.

But I don't know if the HFPA or the censors or the producers had a tight rein on him, because it didn't seem like he completely let loose. Frankly, the pre-award ads were hysterical, so I guess my expectations were similarly raised. His banter was funny, but not bust-gustingly funny. Ricky's humor has an edge (kind of like a smarmy British cousin of Conan O'Brien), unlike, say, Craig Ferguson, who pokes more gentle fun at people. So I could see why the PTB would tell him to tone it down. And speaking of Ferguson, I think would be a terrific host for next year's GG. But, I digress, and would give Ricky a B for his hosting.

Among the highlights of the night:

Mo'Nique received the first award for Supporting Actress in Precious, thanking Director Lee Daniels and her husband, with whom they pledged to each other that they would become famous actors one day. She concluded with a nod to the movie and its dealing with emotional and physical abuse and said "This is for everyone who has been touched...now is the time to stand up and say something."

Meryl Streep, who won for Julie and Julia, thanked her mother (who died last year), who she noted was a "marvelous cook" and served, along with Child, as her inspiration for the role. She expressed her mixed emotions at going to an event that could be seen by many as frivolous. But Meryl said she felt sure her mother would have told her to "give [to Haiti] as much as you can, do whatever you can, and go to the show grateful for the opportunity."

Robert Downey, Jr. gave the best speech, starting with, "Well, I'll tell who I'm not going to thank for this award, and that's my wife Susan [who was also a producer on Sherlock Holmes]. She told me at 10 o'clock this morning that I had no chance of winning so I didn't have to worry about writing any speech." His "not thanking" turned serious and very heartfelt, particularly when talking, indirectly, with the people that stood by him during tough times.

In her speech, Sandra Bullock told her relatives to "put down the Maker's Mark and get to bed." Like Downey, Bullock's speech started funny, then turned serious when thanking her husband, Jesse James: "It's no surprise to me that my work has gotten better in the past few years, and that's because of you, and I have you to thank."

Most of the award recipients were predictable, but one that drew gasps was when The Hangover won for best Comedy or Musical, beating out Nine, Julie & Julia, It's Complicated, and (500) Days of Summer. I know those HFPA correspondents are a little offbeat and kooky, but this was a shocker to me.

The pre-show was marred by rain, which did not allow much star lingering on the red carpet. The venue, the Beverly Hills Hilton, made in my mind a major blunder by not covering the red carpet. People: you know that it's going to rain and using clumsy BHH umbrellas to try to protect people from the rain didn't cut it.

As for the fashion, I was underwhelmed. Underwhelmed! Watching the awards shows last year, I was bowled over by so many beautiful dresses, but at the GG there were more strike outs than home runs. But I'll start with the good:

Kate Hudson got a lot of flak for her choice, a long white gown with a sculptural quality, but I liked it. The ruffle at the bodice softened the look, and the gown fit her perfectly. Her choice of jewelry--a dangling pair of pearl and diamond earrings--was just enough. I don't know how she walked in her shoes--platformed stilletos--but Kate is a petite thing, and the shoes definitely gave her a longer line.

Reese Witherspoon was a no-show on the red carpet due to the inclement weather, but viewers got a peek at her dress when she presented. A bright jeweled blue with the asymmetrical/one shoulder design that was very popular that night, I thought she looked young and fresh, but she looked a little too thin.

Speaking of young and fresh, Heather Graham was both in a long, black sequined halter dress with a plunging neckline. With her hair sleekly pulled back and with subtle makeup, she looked like a dewy ingenue.

Another "new generation" that I thought got it right was Ginnifer Goodwin. She, like many women, chose a cocktail-length dress, hers in a vibrant purple. But unlike many other people, who looked too casual, Ginnifer's look was an excellent spin on updated formal. She also had the asymmetrical/one shoulder look, but because how the fabric was fashioned, it literally gave the dress a new twist.

Jennifer Gardner strengthened her reputation as a fashion maven by choosing this sparkly one shoulder gown with an interesting sequined pattern. It fit her very well and she was one of the few women who wore her hair down without the hair looking limp.

Mo'Nique was glowing throughout the night but I didn't get the long, draped gown in a satin gold. It looked too much like a pair of drapes (remember that old Carol Burnett sketch "I saw it in the window and I just had to have it"?).

Mariah Carey exercised poor choice and complete lack of decorum in her waaaaay-too-revealing (and waay too tight) dress. Lots of women did plunging necklines, but Mariah's dress showed too much and the fit was not flattering.

It was great to see Tea Leone and David Dukovny out and together as a couple, but Tea's outfit was a bit of a head scratcher. She looked more like a soccer mom with a blue oxford cloth shirt (David's, maybe?) and a necklace that looked like pop beads (her daughter's maybe?).

Also, sadly, not looking her best was Julia Roberts, in a very casual, short black dress wearing a strange, Mr. T-style necklace. Her hair had that tousled, just got out of bed look, that went with the dress--if she had been going out to dinner rather than an awards show.

And finally, Drew Barrymore, one of my favorites glowed throughout the evening. Her dress, made especially for her by Donatella Versace, was a beautiful nude-pink tone that perfectly complemented her skin tone. But sadly, the Versace gown had these objects attached to the shoulder and waist that kind of looked like glittery porcupines. I like the idea of something sparkly on this dress, but a vintage brooch pinned to the shoulder or waist would be a less prickly alternative.

Speaking of prickly, that's all the barbs from me. I'll revert back to more non-fashion current events until the Oscars next month.

Re: Your LinkedIn Request...

2010-01-27T13:50:00.005-05:00

Don: What a surprise it was, hearing from you after 15 years -- and asking me if I want to be your LinkedIn "friend". I didn't realize Hell had frozen over...backspace, backspace, delete, delete.

Don: Want to be my LinkedIn friend? I'll tell you where to get LinkedIn my friend, right in the gutter where you slithered in from...erase, erase, erase.

Don: Wow - so you want to catch up and see how I'm doing? Wow, that's actually acting like a human. So unlike our last exchange, when you broke up with me on the phone - remember that ? Oh, and my personal favorite, that the only reason you dated me was because there was so much "cool stuff" going on in my neighborhood? Ring a bell? Well, my "friend", you can go fuc...backspace, erase, backspace, erase.

Don: Good thing you didn't show up at my door asking to be my friend and good thing I don't keep a gun in my house because...okay crossed a line, delete, start over...

Don: Wow, a LinkedIn friend request. Is this your way, 15 years after the fact, to admitting that you might have actually been an absolute assho...let go of anger, backspace, erase, try again...

Don: Are you retarded, I mean really, and I mean that with no disrespect to people who are actually retarded, but did living south of the Mason-Dixon line scramble your brain in such a way that you thought, just for a moment, that I might actually want to exchange pleasantries with you?....not politically correct, erase, backspace, erase...

Don: Thanks for the LinkedIn request, but I think I'm going to pass. Thanks for thinking of me, though, and best of luck in your job search. Regards, Julie Okay, check for misspellings, residual anger, and...send!

Local Libraries Rolling the Dice and Betting on Casino's Success

2009-12-23T20:23:00.006-05:00

As many local Pittsburghers know, earlier this year the Carnegie Library announced the closing of several local branches, including one in Lawrenceville (see photo, left, isn't it lovely?). The library system, like many other nonprofits, has been hit hard by the recession: decreased funding and ever-escalating costs.

Thanks to a number of public rallies, town meetings, and coverage by the local print media in the ensuing months, these libraries--and their patrons--were not going to go down without a fight. While the Commonwealth is not exactly rolling in money, the State House just passed a bill to bring needed funds to City libraries.

The Post-Gazette recently reported that libraries now have an angel investor in an unlikely place: the local casino. Okay, not exactly an angel investor, since the Rivers Casino will be required to give the money through a one percent tax on gross revenues. An additional one percent from the Casino will be earmarked to help fund County libraries and the new Monroeville Convention Center.

Of course, the amounts that are being bandied about are estimated figures, based on what they expect/anticipate (or hope, if you're a pessimist) the casino's revenue to be. To sweeten the pot and to help ensure that the Casino will actually have a better chance of reaching these projected revenues, it would be permitted to expand gaming to include table games.

This legislation is not a done deal, though: it must also pass the State Senate, and not everyone is happy about revenue coming from a required Casino tax. And Pittsburgh City Council has "pledged" $600,000 to support the Hazelwood, West End, Beechview, and Lawrenceville Branches. But as we all know, pledging support and actually cutting a check may be two completely different things.

Pennsylvania State Representative Chelsea Wagner has been vigorously fighting against closing any branches. Ms. Wagner contends that any money provided to the Library be tempered with oversight of where exactly this money will be going. Wagner feels that so far the Library has provided inadequate information about any plan to help raise money for its operational support. "They have not shown any indication that they're going to rev up their efforts to cover their operating costs."

One way the Lawrenceville branch in particular could raise money is through rental income. They have an old auditorium in the basement that for years has been unused. It's fallen into disrepair, but get a bunch of volunteers to spruce it up and rent it out.

Speaking from personal experience, I know how difficult it is to find an auditorium in Pittsburgh at an affordable price. There's lots of great venues--the Hazlett, City Theatre, the Frick, Filmmakers, and Charity Randall. But you've got to pay upwards of $1,000 a night, which is completely out of reach for many nonprofits and other community groups.

The Lawrenceville Library Auditorium may not be as posh as the theatres mentioned above, but it doesn't have to be. Charge a fraction of what those venues charge, invite everyone from political debates to dance recitals to rent out the place. It would go a long way to build goodwill amongst the neighborhood, and the Library would have a nice, regular revenue stream: non-restricted revenue that can go straight towards operational costs. And that's what I call a winning hand.

Area Casino Not Such a Sure Bet

2009-10-05T12:09:00.013-04:00

Those of you living in Pittsburgh may remember all of the hoopla associated with the preparation and launching of the Rivers Casino, which recently opened.

First was the debate over where to put this casino. After the powers that be rejected an offer by one developer (who promised to not only build the casino uptown but also to build--completely free of charge--a new arena), the winner ended up being developer Don Bardo. Bardo, whose winning bid placed the casino on the north side, promised, with local politicos joined at his hip, lots of things. Oodles of revenue to reduce everyone's real estate taxes! A boon to the local tourist industry! And who can forget Smokey Robinson, Bardo's bud and business partner, who was going to be a frequent headliner in the casino's lounge.

Not long after the new casino broke ground last year did Bardo get into financial trouble and lost (or couldn't come up with the promised) financing. Another consortium picked up where Bardo left off, and the casino opened to very little fanfare.

A terrific story in the Post-Gazette reported that the Rivers Casino is doing significantly less business than anticipated, and the S&P has reduced its creditworthiness by a notch.

The whole casino debacle has had me scratching my head for so long it's any wonder I have any hair left. To this day, I cannot understand how a plan that included not only a casino but a free arena was passed over by Bardo's north side casino.

It's not a huge surprise to me that the casino is not doing well. For one thing, how the hell do you get over there? The location of the casino is in no man's land, sandwiched between the Carnegie Science Center and Heinz Field in a section of the north side that is completely inaccessible to pedestrians and difficult to reach by car, thanks to a mystifying labyrinth of roads.

The new casino is offering no free shuttle service, which to me is a major misstep. The only shuttle in operation is privately owned and costs $10 each way. While the casino advertises having a complimentary garage, there have been reports that on Steelers game days patrons had to pay up to $50.

Unlike many casinos, the Rivers is becoming famously stingy on its amenities: no free alcohol, soft drinks sparingly doled out, and the casino's "Players Card" giving away very few freebies and players reporting better luck on the machines playing with cash rather than with the Card.

I hate to say I told you so, but I never bought into Ravenstahl's and Onorato's rhetoric that all this money would pour in, which would translate into property taxes being slashed. We're in the middle of a recession, people! No one has money to spend.

The other big problem with the Rivers Casino is the competition. The Meadows racetrack added a casino at about the same time the Rivers opened. Unlike the Rivers, it's right off a major interstate, has ample free parking, and also offers harness racing. While it is south of the city, the Meadows has the advantage of an easy drive and a well-marked route to get them there.

Of course, one only has to drive a bit further on Route 79 past the Meadows to get to Wheeling Downs. There, guests can enjoy the slot machines, and harness racing, and table games. It would be interesting to me to see what kind of decrease Wheeling Downs has experienced from fewer Pennsylvania gamblers. My instincts tell me it's not been much of a dip.

I can't stand the fact that we have gambling in Pittsburgh in the first place, but with that said, if we're going to have gambling here, we might as well take steps to make the casino as attractive as possible. The Rivers can step up to the plate and start offering free shuttle service from downtown, pony up more freebies (especially for Reward Card holders), and offer visitors superlative service. The county (or appropriate powers that be) should take the necessary steps so the Rivers can add table games, making it market competitive and to ensure its long-term success.

Pittsburgh: Finally Back to Normal

2009-09-30T10:24:00.013-04:00

The G-20 is now history, and participants, political pundits, and members of the media are lauding Pittsburgh and everyone involved in organizing and coordinating the Summit itself. Luke Ravenstahl is going to throw out his back for all of the patting on the back he's given himself. But--the buzz around town is that we did such a good job that Pittsburgh is being considered for the 2012 G-20 as well as the 2012 Republican National Convention.

The latter, I am sorry to report (not), will likely not come to fruition, due to an insufficient number of hotel rooms in the downtown core, but we'll all have to wait and see if the G-20 returns in three years.

The e-magazine Pop City has a photo slideshow that contains--not to sound cheezy--really striking and dramatic images. Speaking of dramatic images, this blog's own Nut Bar got his 15 minutes of fame when a Post-Gazette photog snapped him marching in the Peoples Protest last Friday (see photo, right). All I can say is, I'm glad I'm on his good side, most of the time anyway, because he's looking pretty intense in this pic, staring down Officer Friendly in his patrol car.

All in all, I would agree with the experts and call the G-20, overall, a success. But where it failed was giving the G-20 attendees an abysmal view of the downtown core. By banning virtually everyone from that area and with vendors boarding up their storefronts, all you needed were a few tumbleweeds and it would look like a ghost town. I understand the need for security, but it's really unfortunate that G-20 delegation had to see the downtown in this manner.

I also realize that previous G-20 summits attracted tens of thousands of protesters, so initially it made sense for Pittsburgh to ramp up the police presence. But as far as protests go, it was pretty much a flat tire from a security perspective. The protest on Thursday was unpermitted (you need a permit from the city to have a march) but a group of self-proclaimed anarchists convened anyway at 40th Street (yep, that's four blocks from my house) and were stopped by the time they got to 32nd or so. Of this group of a few hundred, only 10 people or so were arrested.

The "main" protest occurred on Friday, which was permitted and organized by many groups, including the Thomas Merton Center. This event was organized, well run, and as the police put it "were policed by the protesters." None of the 8,000+ protesters were arrested, which I think is a great testament to the ones doing the protesting as well as the police for exercising good judgment.

What I don't understand is why, why, why, when the main protest concluded, they didn't ratchet down the number of police. At this point, having thousands of officers didn't make much sense: many came in to manage rowdy protesters, and there wasn't really anything for them to do. Why not send the out-of-town officers on their way?

A lot of people are speculating if hosting G-20 was worth the trouble and expense. I think it will certainly help the city in the long-term. Showcasing Pittsburgh on the national news in a positive light can only be a benefit and will help in what I would call the "branding" of the city. But like most branding, it's often hard to quantify the results.

However, in the meantime, the city has to deal with the short-term consequences. I have not heard the latest figures, but even with federal assistance, the city is going to be stuck with a multi-million dollar bill for security. What I want to know is where this money is going to come from. If it ends up coming from my wallet, I won't be too happy about it.

Also, in what I consider a major drop of the ball, downtown eateries and retailers suffered needlessly. The P-G reported that many restaurants, having been told by VisitPittsburgh to expect hordes of people in the week before and week of G-20, stocked up on food and liquor. Then these same restaurants saw the fencing go up, essentially shutting off their venue from anyone from the G-20. Since VisitPittsburgh was one of the major players in the planning of this event, I'd say they have a lot of 'splaining to do.

So one thing I'm going to do is make it a point to visit at as many downtown restaurants as I can. If they're hurting from the G-20, it will give me an excuse to call up a friend to meet for a cocktail. Dirty martini, anyone?

Welcome to the War Zone!

2009-09-23T12:40:00.009-04:00

Many friends of mine know I'm a huge fan of end-of-the-world movies. If it's about the world's impending doom or after a handful of nuclear bombs have detonated, I'll be first in line at the theatre. My obsession is so bad that several months ago I had a vivid dream whose story mimicked the new show "Flashforward." But I'll save discussion of that dream--and end-of-the-world movies--for another post.

Because right now, if I didn't know any better, I'd think that Pittsburgh is preparing for the end of the world. My seven block walk from the bus stop to the Law & Finance Building this morning was spooky: lots of boarded up storefronts, street traffic reduced to next to nothing, and the handful of people on the sidewalks were all walking purposefully, eyes downcast. I also saw a lot of police officers: in squad cars, on motorcycles, and on foot with dogs.

This afternoon I'm perched in a downtown office building overlooking the courthouse. Car traffic has not increased, but the silence is pierced by the regular sound of sirens. I just saw a convoy of ten police vehicles gunning down Grant Street--two I noticed from Montgomery County (that's the Philadelphia area, for those unfamiliar with Pennsylvania) and for the last two hours, it's been nonstop beeping and sirens.

But this is the last "normal" day downtown: tonight the barricades go up to cordon off the G-20 zone from the rest of us (code for civilians and those mean, despicable protesters). From what I understand, unless you are involved with the G-20 (delegates, media, police, G-20 volunteers, etc.) or live downtown, no one gets in or out.

During the Summit, buses will be diverted, dropping off passengers on the other side of downtown, for those poor souls who have the misfortune of having to work downtown, outside of the G-20 zone.

For all of Obama's good intentions of letting Pittsburgh showcase all the wonderful things to do and see here, I'm not sure what the G-20 delegates are going to make of all of this. Opinions expressed in recent news articles feel that Pittsburgh will end up losing money rather than making money, based on the added costs for security.

As if this makes it all better, the Summit planning committee will be outfitting volunteers and other helpful individuals with this special pin (shown above). So welcome to Pittsburgh, G-20-ers! Don't mind all of the barbed wire and boarded up buildings--we're the most livable city in the country!

EarthEcycle update

2009-08-25T13:43:00.002-04:00

Just a quick update regarding an earlier post regarding EarthEcycle. Since my original post, the EPA has turned back now two (it was originally one) cargo shipments allegedly originating from EarthEcycle headed to South Africa.

As recently reported in the Trib EarthEcycle has asked for an administrative hearing with the EPA, to say, as Jeff Nixon himself (I'm assuming it was him, since he posted the comment anonymously) said, get all of the facts out.

However, EPA spokeperson Deb Berlin said that the request from EarthEcycle came after the deadline given to the company, so it remains to be seen if EarthEcycle's request will be approved.

The Trib further reported that the Monroeville warehouse still contains discarded computer and electronic parts, and that the company stands to potentially be fined up to $37,000 a day if found out of compliance by the EPA. Stay tuned!

Julie & Julia; Julie and that Bobby Guy

2009-08-10T20:01:00.009-04:00

Today I went to the movies to celebrate a financially profitable month (thank you, air bed and breakfast) and to escape the hottest day of the summer. Taking the suggestion of a couple friends of mine, I went to see Julie & Julia.

I can't recommend this movie enough: Nora Ephron did a marvelous job interweaving the stories of the two principal characters: Julia Child and her diplomat husband, Paul; and Julie Powell and her editor husband, Eric. I suspect that Meryl Streep will get the lion's share of attention in her portrayal of Julia, but to my mind, Stanley Tucci did just as brilliant a job. The two of them had genuine chemistry and became Julia and Paul quite convincingly onscreen.

Kudos also to Amy Adams and Chris Messina, who also did a great job as Julie and Eric. They gave what I thought were not-over-the-top performances (I mean this as a compliment) and also had a nice on-screen rapport. And of course the fifth star of the movie was the food, and my God, if you don't leave the theatre ravenous, then there's something wrong with you.

Going into the movie I knew more about Julia than I did Julie and of course knew that Julie had written a blog (before everyone and their brother wrote one, myself included). But I knew nothing about what prompted her to start writing. Turns out she had a job in lower Manhattan post-9/11 in a part customer service rep, part ombudsman, part whipping boy as she helped families of the victims. It also turns out that she was also a writer with a half-finished novel and a circle of friends who were uber successful.

On the eve of her 30th birthday, her husband suggests writing a blog, and once she got the idea of working her way through the entire Child cookbook, she took to it like a house afire. As a blogger myself, I shared in her blogger-related joy in parts of the movie ("I got my first comment!" she excitedly shared with a co-worker, then quickly deflates when the identify of the commenter is revealed; then, later "I got 53 comments and they're all from no one I know!").

The movie got me to thinking about this blog, and I thought I'd tell you all why I started mine. Because I guess it never occurred to me to tell you. Duh.

When I was a little girl I loved two things: reading and writing. Growing up in a small town in a fairly remote area, reading gave me an opportunity to be, as Isak Dinesen said, "a mental traveler." And writing gave me the chance to create worlds of my own.

I never thought I was smart enough or good enough to write for a living, so I went to school and took business classes and got a job at a bank. Then fate intervened and I found myself out of a job a few years later. After some "what do I want to do with my life" moments, I decided to go back to school. I got a job at CMU, and took two writing classes there, which I loved. It didn't hurt that I had the good fortune of having some of the smartest English majors in the classes and very supportive professors.

So I graduated and I did a bunch of stuff: consulting, marketing at an engineering firm, working for a bunch of trade associations, and finally starting a charity. When the time came to look for a job last year, I knew I wanted to get back to doing more writing as part of my job.

There's a company in Pittsburgh that is the go-to place for writing, strategic planning, branding, etc. I'd been applying for every available job, when finally I got an interview. As interviews go, it was a weird one, with a guy I'll call Bobby and a girl I'll call Betty (which may or may not be their real names). They made a bunch of snarky, inside-y type of jokes, and I got the sense that sitting at the table interviewing me on the pleasure scale was somewhere between a root canal and having your motherboard crash.

Post-interview, Bobby tells me I have to take a writing test, and emails it to me. It's a draft of a magazine article. It's dreadful. I've been allocated no more than 2 1/2 hours to either re-write or write one from scratch. I research the topic, write the article, checking punctuation, etc., and email it back. Then I get an email back. Apparently it is so bad that Bobby not only doesn't want to hire me, but won't even consider having me work freelance.

Talk about deflated. Then angry--I have a writing degree, dammit. From CMU--known for its writing programs, yes, plural, programs! Then--oopsie--I realize I'm forgetting one trifling detail: I hadn't written anything of any length in over three years! Three years! Of course I sucked!

So just like a marathoner has to stretch muscles and go for a run each day, I decided I had to exercise my brain--or at least the part of the brain that allows me to string words together, anyway. So I had to find a way to write: on a regular basis, doing research, finding topics, coming up with something interesting to say.

So this blog was born. This isn't Tolstoy, but it's my little mental stretching of those writing brain cells. And saying I designed and write a blog looks not bad on my resume. So thanks, Bobby, for giving me a figurative kick in the pants when I was getting too big for my britches. I owe you one. And your weird little friend, too.

Two Attacks: One Local, One Worldwide

2009-08-07T17:01:00.013-04:00

I saw the headline on Yahoo! -- shooting in gym kills at least 3, injuring others. It didn't mention the city, and I assumed it happened somewhere else. Then I saw my friend Lori posted on Facebook: "Just wanted to let everyone know I'm okay. I'm a member of LA Fitness, but I wasn't there this morning," and I realized that the shooting happened here in Pittsburgh.

According to reports, George Sodini entered the Collier Township gym and sprayed bullets into a group of women gathered for an early morning exercise class. Then, after killing 3 and injuring 10 more, he turned the gun on himself.

Acquaintances and co-workers recall Sodini seeming like a normal enough guy. Sodini, 48, worked at K&L Gates, doing IT work for the prestigious law firm for the last ten years. He owned a small, tidy home in Scott Township, where his neighbors describe him as friendly, although not overly so.

But it seems Sodini had lots of secrets, which he shared online. Like Richard Pawlawsky, the individual who killed three police officers this spring in Stanton Heights, Sodini also chronicled his ramblings via an online diary. It's full of racial and political epithets, hatred directed at his family, his friends, and his employer.

Fueled by self-proclaimed loneliness, lack of happiness in his life, and his perceived rejection by women over more than a decade juxtaposed against the "young girls here [who] look so beautiful" at 24 Hour Fitness, he begins a plan: arming himself and killing. Read his online diary and you'll find evidence that within his "normal" exterior laid a very troubled man.

While Sodini took great lengths to leave some sort of legacy through his diary (where he urges "copy this to netgroups, where my voice will speak forever"), another individual halfway around the world from Pittsburgh was equally intent on removing the voice of another.

Yesterday, social networking sites Twitter, Facebook, LiveJournal, and the site that hosts this blog, Blogger, were all hacked into. Facebook, LiveJournal, and Blogger (for the most part) stayed online, but Twitter's site completely went dark.

Ordinarily my response would be so what, these sites are fairly frivolous and the worst that could happen is that you have to wait a few hours to take yet another inane Facebook quiz. However, according to published reports, the attack was carefully planned and orchestrated and had only one target: an individual going by the user name Cyxymu.

So what's so special about this guy Cyxymu? Cyxymu is reportedly from the former Soviet republic of Georgia and has been making some statements that made some people angry. So angry, in fact, that they decided to silence Cyxymu by bringing down these web sites. The fact that not only Cyxymu, but the other millions of users also went offline, was apparently just collateral damage.

Internet experts have tracked the hackers location to Abkhazia, a territory along the eastern coast of the Black Sea that's in dispute between Russia and the Republic of Georgia. The presumed thinking was, shut down the websites, and it will shut up the person.

Many of you know that in 2003, I started a nonprofit that brought together volunteers with charities that needed help. Pretty innocuous, right? As it turned out, another charity didn't like what we were doing and threatened us with a lawsuit. When we didn't back down, four weeks later our web site was hacked into and destroyed. Coincidence? I never thought so. The FBI were called in and traced the hackers to overseas, where their jurisdiction ended, and the case was closed.

It was bad enough that this happened, but the hackers hacked into the server and not only destroyed our site, but the 50-60 other sites on the server, not unlike these hackers that brought down an entire site in an attempt to silence one person.

No one wins when a hacking like this takes place. And as these hackers will discover, it won't shut down a single person or a single organization. A few weeks later, my web site was back online, intact and just as strong as ever. I suspect the same will happen to Cyxymu.

Buy One Get One Free Applies to Groceries and Sometimes...Diplomacy

2009-08-04T15:51:00.011-04:00

You can laugh at Bill Clinton all you want, but he is the "git er done" man of the hour, paying a visit to North Korean dictator Kim Jong Il and successfully convincing North Korea to free Euna Lee and Laura Ling, the two American journalists arrested in March for illegally crossing the border into North Korea.

Clinton was an unexpected choice, doing what I'll call a "Jimmy Carter" (an ex-president pressed into service to do some quasi-diplomatic work) and sitting down with Kim Jong Il, who, according to an Associated Press report has not met with a prominent leader from the West since allegedly suffering from a stroke a year ago. In fact, Carter might have been a more logical choice, since he himself sat down with Kim Il Sung, Jong Il's father, for similiar, unofficial diplomatic talks in 1994.

The situation of using Clinton reminds me of a slogan used in Clinton's first presidential campaign: buy one, get one free. In that case, it referred to electing Clinton (buy one) and getting the brainpower of Hillary, too (get one free).

It's interesting that this time, roles have been reversed, with Obama appointing Hillary and getting Bill for free. Many politicos squonked about Bill being a detriment when Hillary ran, and I will admit he publicly said some pretty reactive, stupid, off-the-cuff remarks. But maybe, like Carter, he has found his ken as a behind-the-scenes guy smoothing the way with prickly dictators and even closing a few deals.

I'm sure the commentators will express trepitation that he will overextend his power and influence, usurping not only his wife's role as Secretary of State, but of Obama's as well.

And I mean this as no disregard to Clinton (or Albright before her), but despite many Americans thinking that the world is an enlightened a place as we are when it comes to the role and status of women in work and society, it's not. Certainly it's safe to include North Korea into this less-enlightened category.

And while I don't think that anyone should replace Hillary Clinton (or any female in that position) as chief diplomat, perhaps in countries where we know females are treated as third-class citizens, adding to the mix a seasoned (and yes, male) diplomat such as Bill Clinton (or Bill Richardson or John McCain or even Jimmy Carter) makes infinite sense. Especially someone who has a long-standing, positive relationship with a person or country that historically has not been an ally.

Since the journalists' arrest and sentencing Obama, Hillary Clinton, and others in the State Department have issued public apologies to North Korea and asking for the immunity of the arrested journalists. And there were indications that perhaps it wasn't falling on deaf ears.

In July, Ling (through a phone call to her sister Lisa Ling, herself a National Geographic Channel correspondent) reported that she and Lee were never transferred to prison after sentencing, but were rather being held in what was classified as a "guest house". It was speculated that while they were not free per se, their kind of house arrest was preferable and more humane than in transferring them into the North Korean jail system.

I have long said that North Korea is the country to watch, especially with Kim Jong Il at the helm. Not to discount the unrest and atrocities in other parts of the world, but we sometimes tend to forget this little island country that now, suddenly, has nuclear capability and a leader that doesn't always seem to think too rationally. I am hopeful that this is but a small step in a series of other steps to open up diplomatic talks with North Korea.

Vick Becoming a Steeler? A Dog of an Idea.

2009-07-24T11:48:00.006-04:00

Michael Vick (shown left, with his attorney) is asking for a chance. I don't know if this has involved getting on bended knee and groveling, but the former Atlanta Falcons star did meet Wednesday with NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell concerning Vick's possible reinstatement.

We Americans tend to have a short memory when it comes to things like this, so let's recap what Vick did: using money he earned playing football, he funded a dogfighting ring: an activity that is not only illegal, but immoral and downright deplorable. This activity took place in a house that Vick owned, again paid for with revenue from football.

If you are not familiar with dogfighting, it is a brutal, horrible bloodbath of a "sport"--dogs are bred to be aggressive, to attack animals, and to fight to the death. People pay to see this, and apparently Vick was happy to bankroll this operation.

When these charges first surfaced in 2006, Vick denied any involvement. His denial continued for months, until his former associates presented evidence against him, and testified against him at the trial. Vick was subsequently found guilty of charges associated with operating a dogfighting ring, and was sentenced to 23 months in a federal prison. Personally, I think the punishment of 23 months did not fit the crime, but that discussion I will save for another post.

So now Vick wants to return to football. I have mixed feelings about this (again, for another post), but his reinstatement is up to Commissioner Goodell. Sources say reinstatement will likely happen, perhaps with a four-game suspension once Vick is signed with a team.

Of course, speculation is running rampant about who might sign Vick. Experts agree that once signed, keeping Vick out of the limelight would be advisable, so a starting quarterback position would be all but out of the question. With this (possible) scenario in mind, it's likely that the team most likely in a position to sign Vick would be an NFL teams who already have a solid starting quarterback already, but might need a relief, second-string player.

And who might those teams be? The New England Patriots and....the Steelers! An article published on Yahoo! reported that the Patriots and Steelers "both have fan bases that would be accepting of the team taking a chance on Vick."

What? What?!! Pittsburghers may have a mentality that said "give the kid a chance" when it came to electing Luke Ravenstahl, but there is no way on God's green earth that Steeler fans are going to come close to embracing this former operator of a dogfighting ring.

Not to mention the players themselves: many of the Steelers are dog owners and admitted animal lovers, including Deshea Townsend, Charlie Batch, Jerome Bettis, and Ben Roethlisberger. The Steelers has lent support to area animal shelters: shelters that provide a safe haven to the kinds of dogs that fall victim to organized dogfights.

I can only hope that what the experts are speculating is just that: speculation. But let's nip this thing in the bud, and tell the Steelers organization that despite what the experts think, we don't want to see Vick on the bench, wearing a black and gold jersey. You can contact the Steelers organization and tell them exactly what you think about the idea of Vick becoming a Steeler. Here's their contact information:

Administrative offices:

Pittsburgh Steelers

3400 South Water Street

Pittsburgh, PA 15203-2349

Phone: (412) 432-7800

Fax: (412) 432-7878

Not Too Late for the Fairytale Ending

2009-07-09T00:18:00.010-04:00

Figure skating is a solitary sport. You train alone, with your coach. You get up every morning before the sun comes up, to spend hours in a cold rink. Jumping and falling, jumping and falling. The same series of movements, over and over, with toe pointed, head tilted, hand fluttering just so. Always with a smile on your face.

Every day of the year you train: ballet and dance lessons. Weight training. Running. Workouts in the gym. And twenty hours every week in the rink.

Yours is a sport that despite having a newer, more quantitative scoring system, you’re still judged on everything from the color of your panty hose to the number of sequins on your outfit. Your off-rink life is judged. Are you humble? Are you articulate and well spoken? Do you come from a respectable family? Do you deserve to win?

You don’t have a life outside of your sport. Every morsel of food, every swallow of liquid is parsed out and monitored. You give up friends, you give up school, you give up a social life, you give up a life with your family. You’re 15 years old and can’t remember a time when life wasn’t like this.

Your sport is a series of qualifying contests that leads up to one big contest. There’s no coverage of the qualifying contests, like all of the football games that lead to the super bowl. No one in TV Land cares who won the Midwest Sectionals or the New England Regionals. In your sport, the only thing people are interested in and tune into is the Big Event: The US Nationals.

With Nationals, it’s the equivalent of the last play of the Superbowl, fourth down, and you’re the quarterback trying to throw the winning pass. You have less than seven minutes to show the judges you are worthy. There are no mulligans, no do-overs. You have one chance: one slip of the blade, one fall spells failure.

You approach the ice and think about the thousands of hours of practice, the $100,000 or so each year you and your family spend to get you to this point. In this sport, everyone sacrifices.

The winner and runner-up receives parades, glory, and a chance to compete internationally. Anything less than third place is a disappointment and another year to train--and hope.

Given all of this, you have to wonder why anyone would want to become a competitive figure skater. Maybe it’s the feeling of propelling yourself and flying in the air. Maybe it’s the combination of artistry and athleticism.

In 1994, skater Nicole Bobek was asked why she skated and she just shrugged her shoulders and said, “Because I like it.”

Bobek had what coaches would call raw talent. She was an easy--albeit sometimes sloppy-- jumper, and yet being a bit rough around the edges, had a lightness and grace about her on the ice. Growing up never knowing her father, Bobek and her mother, a former skater from the Czech Republic, formed a close-knit bond.

Listen to skating commentators today, and septagenarian telecaster (and former Olympian) Dick Buttons will still wax poetic at the grace of Nicole Bobek. It's rumored that because Buttons went on and on about Bobek's signature spiral (in photo, right), that it served as a wake-up call for other skaters, including Michelle Kwan and Sasha Cohen, who ended up with signature spiral sequences of their own.

Bobek’s ascent into elite figure skating did not come easily. Her skating record could diplomatically best be described as irratic. One year she came in fourth, the next 16th. She earned a reputation as being rebellious and difficult: she smoked cigarettes and had a mouth like a sailor, which of course only endeared her to me.

She had ankle problems, and weight issues, and sometimes lacked a commitment in her training. In the course of her career, she hired and fired a dozen coaches in a sport where a coach is regarded much like a marriage partner: one you stick by through thick and thin.

However, in 1995, 16 year old Bobek, despite herself and against all odds, won the U.S. Senior Ladies Nationals. She later went on that year to place third in Worlds. You might not remember Bobek because, despite her gold at Nationals and a bronze at Worlds, subsequent performances were not as good: she placed third in 1997 and 1998, earning her a berth on the 1998 Olympic team, where nerves and injuries got the better of her, and placed a disappointing 17th place.

Sadly, Bobek did not get the storybook ending that she very likely wished for. A few days ago Bobek was arrested as part of a large drug ring that sold and distributed methamphetamine.

You can't help but wonder what happened to Bobek. If you look at her MySpace page, you see a girl whose hero is her mom, enjoys doing charity work, and who hopes to be a mother “someday”. Three years ago, she even made her acting debut acting alongside Oscar winner Sean Penn.

Bobek’s self-declared hero, her mother, is standing by her daughter’s side, posting the $100,000 bail and saying she will help her in whatever way she can. She still has faith in her daughter, saying that she is a good girl and got mixed up with the wrong crowd.

Bobek is only 31, and it breaks my heart that someone so young with so much going for them becomes seduced by drugs. I hope that she doesn't see herself as a has-been, but a smart, funny, intelligent girl that made some bad choices. I hope that her mom continues to stand by her, to help her daughter make some better choices, so she can get clean, take accountability at the charges in front of her, so she can have another chance at the fairytale ending that she--and everyone else--deserves.

150 Years

2009-07-08T17:25:00.004-04:00

That was the sentence recently handed down to Bernard Madoff, proprietor of the now-infamous Ponzi scheme that bilked scores of people, trusts, and nonprofits out of their retirements, pensions, and endowments.

While Ira Sorkin, Madoff's attorney (shown with Madoff), asked for leniency and suggested a sentence of 12 years, Judge Chin (my new hero) disagreed and gave Madoff the maximum permitted by law.

"Here the message must be sent that Mr. Madoff's crimes were extraordinarily evil," Chin said in his remarks, which brought with it applause and cheers from the gallery, many of whom were Madoff's victims. "I simply do not get the sense that Mr. Madoff has done all that he could or told all that he knows," Chin added, a sentiment shared with many, including this blogger.

Those in the courtroom reported that Madoff sat or stood impassively while victim after victim took the stand and told their stories of money and trust lost. When it came time for him to make a statement, Madoff said that he was sorry: ""I will live with this pain, with this torment, for the rest of my life. I live in a tormented state knowing the pain and suffering I have created," but his statements left most victims unmoved.

In the courtroom, Madoff literally and figuratively stood alone, with the absence of any family members in the gallery. Moreover, Judge Chin stated that the court received not even a single letter of support, testifying to any good deeds or charitable works. "The absence of such support is telling," Chin said. I'll say. Even serial killers can count on their mothers or someone to provide a statement, or ask for leniency, but Madoff only had his hired hand, attorney Sorkin, at his side.

Madoff's wife finally broke her silence in a statement on the day of sentencing claiming that she had no knowledge of the true nature of Madoff's business. "From the moment I learned from my husband that he had committed an enormous fraud, I have had two thoughts--first, that so many people who trusted him would be ruined financially and emotionally, and, second, that my life with the man I have known for over 50 years was over." Anyone else find her ignorance hard to believe?

While Madoff and his wife have agreed to sell their assets (including a Manhattan penthouse, Long Island estate, villa in France, Palm Beach mansion, and other valuables), Mrs. Madoff will still be left with $2.5 million. I can't strongly enough express how wrong I think that is. She should be left with nothing, just like all of the people who invested and are now left penniless.

It has also been reported that Madoff's two sons, Andrew and Mark, borrowed a combined $31.5 million from their father. I think these loans should be paid in full, with the proceeds paid as restitution to swindled investors.

And in fact, while I'm thinking about it, I think that any money, any pathetic earnings that Madoff makes while working in prison should be garnished and distributed to his victims. It might just mean a few cents every year for each victim, but the satisfaction in receiving this sort of compensation might just be priceless.

When No News Isn't Necessarily Good News

2009-07-05T22:34:00.007-04:00

This story broke a little over a week ago, but it's an important one that I wanted to share. The Archives of Internal Medicine (a JAMA--Journal of the American Medical Association--publication) reported on a study completed at Weill Cornell (New York) Medical College regarding notifying patients of test results.

The news, in short, is not good: the study showed that an average of 7% of the time, patients whose test results were abnormal were not notified by their doctor, with some failure rates as high as 26%. Practices whose record keeping was part paper, part electronic fared the worst over those practices that were completely paper or completely electronic.

The study also surveyed doctors about in-house procedures for notifying patients of their medical test results. The findings of this survey were equally alarming: the average process score was 3.8 out of 6, with most medical practices not using all five of the basic processes suggested in literature. Further, most practices did not even have in place explicit guidelines for notifying patients of results.

Doctors say that the volume of patients and lack of time make it difficult to contact patients. But if practices don't even have a protocol in place about patients' medical tests results, it makes it difficult, if not impossible, for anyone in the practice to notify patients, let alone the doctor.

Doctors are busy, there's no doubt about it. And given the decreasing amounts of money medical practices receive through health insurance reimbursement, doctors are only going to get busier and this situation is likely to get proportionately worse.

You'd think that doctors would be more mindful of this negligence, given that we live in such a litigious culture. Failing to provide a patient abnormal test results could certainly have disastrous results. But apparently this is happening, sometimes as many as one in four times.

This is clearly an example where you need to be the advocate for yourself, and badger the doctor's office for the results. Because just because you don't get the "all clear" from the doctor doesn't necessary mean everything is okay.

Hello and...Buh-Bye

2009-07-03T22:03:00.005-04:00

In what has to be the longest contested race ever, the Minnesota State Supreme Court unanimously ruled what many of us have known for a long time: that Al Franken is indeed U.S. Senator. With this senatorial race now finally concluded, the number of Democrats in the Senate now total 60, giving them a majority and making them filibuster-proof. In theory, anyway.

Franken gave a very nice victory speech in which he praised Minnesota Senator Amy Klobuchar, who has, in many respects been doing the work of two senators in the wake of not declaring the Franken/Coleman race. "But she’s only one Senator," Franken said. "And it’s time that Minnesota, like every other state, had two."

Many pundits wonder if Franken, an outspoken author and critic of everything from Rush Limbaugh to Beltway Bandits, can play nice with others now that he himself will be one of those inside the beltway guys. Franken is nothing if not stupid and I believe he will approach the job with humility and an eagerness to learn. Franken will be serving on the judicial committee, and might I suggest he use his time in committee meetings learning at the knee of Pennsylvania's senior Senator, the newly-Democratic Arlen Spector.

The usual blustery Norm Coleman, the now former Senator from Minnesota was unusually nonblustery in his concession speech, which is just about the nicest thing I can say about the man. Now that the race has been decided, all kinds of rumors are buzzing about as to what his future holds. Might I suggest running for Governor...of Alaska!

It seems a vacancy has recently become available, as Sarah Palin abruptly announced in today's press conference (reported in an excellent article by the Associated Press) that she is stepping down as the 49th state's governor. Nut Bar and I caught an excerpt of her speech, and we both turned to each other and went, "Huh?". She rambled about the "millions of dollars down the drain" but never said what millions of dollars she meant. She has mastered the ability of speaking a great deal, but saying absolutely nothing.

In her speech, Palin made no statement about her future, short or long-term, but is apparently not ruling out a (God help us) presidential bid for 2012. 2012 is a long ways away, but I think, I hope, in this case, Americans will have a long memory when it comes to Sarah Palin. By the end of the race, she managed to alienate most people (Democrats and Republicans alike), and her post-campaign PR has maintained a steady downward path. Between the continued sniping between her camp, the Republican National Committee and the McCain camp, to the arrest of Bristol Palin's almost mother-in-law on a multitude of drug charges, to the swirl of talk of ethics violations, she was, in many ways, painted into the proverbial corner with no way out. Or quitting to take a rest while she plans her 2012 comeback, if one believes the Palin-philes.

However, not surprisingly, Palin has plans for writing her memoirs, and has inked a deal with HarperCollins that most guess is in the mid-six figures. So perhaps this will shed some light regarding her sudden resignation. Or maybe it will be 400 pages of dribble drabble. I'm voting for the latter...

Follow-Up Post: Chris Brown Pleads Guilty to One Felony Count

2009-06-25T20:37:00.006-04:00

In an earlier post, I reported the news of an alleged altercation between rapper Chris Brown and his then-girlfriend, pop singer Rhianna. Allegedly the two of them had gotten into a heated argument while Chris was at the wheel of the car, with Rhianna receiving a black eye, concussion, and several lacerations.

Afterwards, Chris Brown denied the charges. Rhianna has kept a low profile, and reports are that she broke up with Brown and has been cooperating with the police and the Los Angeles District Attorney's Office.

Monday, Brown appeared at his hearing, and it was announced in court that an eleventh hour plea agreement had been reached. Brown pled guilty to assault, which is a felony. He received five years probation, must serve 180 hours of community service, and attend an anger management class. Brown has both a protective and stay-away order, forbidding him to harass, stalk, or come within 50 yards of Rhianna.

The plea was an eleventh hour development, because Rhianna apparently did not know of the agreement, and appeared at the courthouse, for the purpose of testifying at the hearing. Formal sentencing will take place August 5th.

I think Brown (and his attorney) saw the writing on the wall that Rhianna, despite early vacillations, was cooperating with authorities and that if left to a jury, the result may well have resulted in a stiffer sentence, including jail time.

I want to applaud Rhianna for wanting to see this thing through, cooperating with authorities, and finding the strength to be willing to testify against her former paramour. And I think Brown is doing the right thing with the plea barging, and hopes he takes the probation and the conditions of his sentence seriously, and learns something about himself in the process.

Brown's attorney reported that Brown will be performing his community service in his home state of Virginia, to be near his family. And I bet one thing Brown's mama will be serving her son is a big serving of humble pie.

"Customers Should Avoid the Red Line"

2009-06-22T22:48:00.006-04:00

Such was the title of the first press release issued shortly after an inbound train stopped at the Takoma Park Metro Station was rear-ended by another train. An understatement, if I've ever heard one.

The following is an exerpt from a subsequent WMATA press release which provides more details:

"This is an incredibly tragic day and our hearts go out to the families of those who suffered fatalities and to those whose loved ones are injured,” said Metro General Manager John Catoe. “We are committed to investigate this accident until we determine why this happened and what must be done to ensure it never happens again.”

Metro officials do not know the cause of the 5 p.m. Monday collision and are not likely to know the cause for several days as the investigation unfolds. Both trains were on the same track headed toward Shady Grove Metrorail station, according to preliminary reports. The female operator was on the trailing train.

What? The "female operator was on the trailing train"?! What the #*$& does that have to do with anything? I could see if it was a drunk operator, or a hopped up on coke operator, but a female operator? I don't see how the gender of the driver had anything to do with anything.

Oh, wait, I get it those female drivers, yeah, right. Maybe she was PMS-ing--you know how hysterical they get "at the time of the month". Or she probably got dumped by her boyfriend, that'll put any female on the edge. Everyone knows men are far better drivers, and this would have never happened if a stable, unemotional male was behind the wheel! Okay, I'm overreacting, but isn't that an odd thing to put in a press release? I'm just sayin'.

I digress and I don't mean to make light of what was really a horrible tragedy. At least six people have died and over 75 people have been critically injured, making this the worst accident in the history of WMATA. Right now there doesn't appear to be any clearcut answer as to the cause for the crash, so it could be anything, including faulty driving, female or not.

I used to work in Silver Spring, which is on the red line, one stop from the Takoma Park station. It is entirely conceivable that former co-workers of mine were on one of the two trains that collided, due to the time of the accident. I am waiting to hear if anyone I know was on the trains, and if so, if they are okay.

I'm really sending my prayers for everyone that was on that train, and according to WMATA, it could have been as many as 1,200 people. Even though it was rush hour, the crash site was near the beginning of the red line, so I am hoping that the number of passengers was less that what they're saying it could be. So in this case I'm hoping that wishing it makes it so...

My House's 15 Minutes of Fame

2009-06-21T13:27:00.006-04:00

Two weeks ago I get a call out of the blue from Jodi, a reporter over at the Tribune-Review. She found my profile on Airbnb and told me she's doing a story about people renting out rooms in their house. Sort of a "how people are coping with the recent economic downturn" kind of article.

James Knox from the Trib came over and took this picture of me lookin' smirky, but damn, he made my house look good! All those "Flip this Flippin' House" shows I watch on HGTV and seeing all those staging tips finally paid off! By the way, the wooden tray on the bed was made by my favorite woodworker, Mr. Dad.

Jodi, who if she was 23 she was a day, tried to get all Woodward and Bernstein on me, asking about the six percent tax "that I'm entitled to pay them", which became more of a highlight in the story than I think it needed to be. And she didn't use my best quips, like "my sister has always called this house the bed and breakfast and now it actually is!"

But no matter, all press is good press, right? And I think the published piece turned out pretty good, if I do say so myself. And this weekend I got my first reservation through Airbnb (the rest have been through craigslist) and another for next weekend. As my Mom would say, "Wheee!"

Best Burger Ever. And Goodbye to a Gentle Giant.

2009-06-18T15:17:00.011-04:00

I was reading Jorge Garcia's recent blog post about his favorite burger joint, P.J. Clarke's in New York City. Someone commenting on Jorge's blog mentioned that P.J.'s was ranked 21st by Burger Rankings, so of course I had to see if my favorite hamburger place made the list, Pittsburgh's own Tessaro's.

Unfortunately, Tessaro's didn't appear on the listing, so I decided to take a cue from Jorge and wax poetic about my favorite burger.

For the uninitiated, Tessaro's is really a Pittsburgh culinary institution. Tessaro's is co-owned by brother and sister Kelly and Ena Harrington, who bought the restaurant in 1985. Neither one of them had restaurant experience before (Kelly used to be a teacher, Ena a former attorney), but they soon had a successful restaurant with a loyal following.

Tessaro's in a nondescript-looking, narrow storefront tucked into Liberty Avenue in Bloomfield. Inside, a long, shiny wooden bar dominates one side of the room, the other has small tables that seat two and can be combined for larger parties. It's a tight squeeze on the seating side, with the host actually lifting and moving the table so the person (or persons) seated against the wall can actually get to the seat.

Fortunately for all of us, in the mid-1990's, Kelly and Ena bought the rowhouse next door, tore down the connecting firewall between the two buildings, and doubled the floor space. The result is a cozy, dark, bustling place with tin ceilings, dark wood, with the small tables topped with tablecloths made of old, soft denim fabric.

Everything is hardwood grilled, with seafood, kebabs, chicken, and barbeque ribs (just on Thursdays--and Fridays, if there's leftovers) included on the diverse menu. But Tessaro's is really best known for its burgers. Also grilled, the hulking, half-pound burger can be served plain or gussied up with cheddar, dry bleu cheese, sauteed mushrooms or onions, and the more pedestrian lettuce/tomato/onion toppings.

Tessaro's doesn't have a deep fryer, so the usual sides of fries and onion rings aren't offered on the menu. Instead, diners can choose home fries, which are peppered with onions cooked on the flattop, making a crunchy, chewy, and flavorful alternative to fries.

Another restaurant anomoly is Tessaro's lack of desserts on the menu. People who want something sweet after dinner are directed next door to Crazy Mocha, for a piece of cake and an espresso. Desserts just allow people to linger, co-owner Kelly once explained, with lingering meaning fewer table turnovers. And with the line of people to get in often spiraling outside and waits as much as 45 minutes, it was wise of the Harrington's to omit dessert from the menu.

Kelly, a big bear of a guy with shaggy hair and beard, acted as host, manning the postage stamp-sized entrance and spill-over of people outside. Tessaro's doesn't take reservations, and Kelly never took names, and knew most people by sight or by name. When a table became available, he would just give you a beckoning, "come on over" gesture, and corral people over to their tables.

Ena is more diminutive both in size and personality, but she is no shrinking violet: Ena is, in a word, unflappable, and can quiet the loudest drunk with a withering look, one of those "I knew you when you were in diapers/your parents raised you better than that" glares that speaks volumes.

The last time I visited Tessaro's was April 17th with Tim, and Ena was playing hostess. "Finally gave Kelly the night off, huh?" I said to her as we came in. She just rolled her eyes and led us to our table.

What I didn't know at the time was that Kelly had actually been diagnosed with non-Hodgkin's lymphoma. He later had a stroke and passed away on May 11th, just two days after his father, famed prosecutor Dennis Harrington lost his battle with cancer. There was a wonderful tribute to father and son in the Post-Gazette, which is how I learned of Kelly's passing.

Kelly was just 57 and was just one of those guys that you instantly like, a gentleman that was truly a gentle man. He will be missed by many people, and visiting Tessaro's will never be the same without Kelly greeting us at the door.

"My Plane Dove Into the Hudson and All I Got Was This Lousy T-Shirt"

2009-06-14T11:44:00.007-04:00

It's hard to believe that you can survive a traumatic experience like a plane crash and then have to worry about how to pay for your medical bills. But that's the current state for many of the passengers of Flight 1549, the USAirways flight that, after having its engines conk out due to flying into a flock of geese, emergency landed in the Hudson River five months ago.

The New York Times is reporting that AIG, the insurance giant that provided the aviation insurance to USAirways, is balking over compensating the survivors of Flight 1549. According to a USAirways spokesperson, all passengers were paid $5,000 for what USAirways calls "their immediate needs"--which in my opinion was a nice gesture of goodwill that they weren't under any obligation to do. And while not mentioned in the article, I think it's safe to say that the airline provided gratis travel to family members of those injured, as well as to fly the survivors to wherever they needed to go. While USAirways got a lot of good press that undoubtedly helped their business, they have acted very decently towards the Flight 1549 survivors.

As the NYT's story points out, making insurance claims in the case of an airplane crash is not as straightforward as a claim on your homeowner's insurance. For example, when the chimney on my house was struck by lightning, I called my insurance carrier, got three quotes, and received a check to make the necessary repairs.

Because in the case of Flight 1549, there was no fault on the part of the pilot or the plane itself: like the thunderbolt that hit my chimney, birds flying into the engines constitute what the insurance industry calls an "act of God".

As the Times story states, "If there is no negligence, then arguably there is no liability, and no obligation [for insurance carrier AIG] to pay claims." So that leaves the passengers with legitimate claims at a bit of a stalemate with AIG. The irony is that if the pilot hadn't landed the plane so expertly and people on board were killed or more severely injured, the victims and the survivor's families would have a better chance of getting money from AIG than what actually happened.

Apparently AIG is telling Flight 1549 passengers to use their own insurance to pay for things like the concussion or broken leg they suffered. But as passenger Tess Sosa points out, there are some injuries that can't be treated with a plaster cast and a band-aid.

Sosa, her husband, and two small children were on the flight (Sosa was sitting with one child, her husband was seated in a different part of the plane with the other), and says that the trauma she experienced and the guilt she feels running towards an exit with her son, leaving her husband and other child behind, haunts her.

Certainly other passengers will be suffering from post-traumatic stress disorder--how could you go through an experience like that and not have some psychological issues about what happened?

These passengers do not strike me as money-grubbing people trying to stick it to AIG. It seems that being compensated for medical bills and subsequent therapy is reasonable. But, as the NYT piece points out, it may take passengers months and maybe years before AIG compensates them for their medical bills for injuries immediately after the crash, and no guarantee of any money for things such as therapy.

I can't help but think that this is AIG's way of figuratively shrugging its shoulders and saying "we're bankrupt, the government has told us to buckle down on our operations, we're simply doing what the government directed us to do."

I don't think that the window of opportunity has closed yet for AIG to do what I think is the right thing to do and provide monetary compensation to the passengers. It's like the old car repair ads of "pay me now or pay me later"--the pay me now is always cheaper than the pay me later, where in this case the passengers are all going to lawyer up (a few of them already have), and file a class action lawsuit. And somehow I have a feeling a jury is not going to believe that AIG doesn't owe these people some money.

"What a Dump!" Indeed

2009-06-12T13:12:00.003-04:00

Sometimes free comes with a price, as the Post-Gazette reported in today's story about e-cycling gone awry.

Most electronic products contain heavy metals such as mercury, cadmium, and lead and are considered to be hazardous waste. Because of this, most landfills will not accept these kinds of products as is. The items must first be broken down, and any parts containing hazardous materials must be sent to a place like a smelting facility, where the metals can be melted down and either re-used or properly disposed of.

In today's age of advanced technology that makes many electronic products out of date or obsolete in a shorter amount of time, the amount of electronic waste is increasing at an alarming rate. Two recent developments have escalated the amount of electronic waste: first, updating old CRT computer monitors with new flat-screen models, and replacing old, analog TV's (which will quit working today -- unless you buy a converter box) with wide-screen LCD or plasma TV sets.

As you might imagine, companies have sprung up that dispose of these heaping piles of discarded electronics. While many of them adhere to guidelines set up by the DEP and the EPA, some do not. Two individuals employed by EarthEcycle (founded by a former Allegheny County employee) have blown the whistle on their former employer, claiming that the company collected the discards and dumped them in the lot behind a former car repair place in Homewood.

According to the P-G story, several local charities partnered with EarthEcycle to collect and recycle old electronics. Jeff Nixon, Owner of EarthEcycle, allegedly told these charities that EarthEcyle would collect used electronics, re-sell items that were salvageable, and then properly dispose of the rest. The charities would get a portion of the profits from the sale of the salvageable material. Among the charity participants were the Make-A-Wish Foundation and the Western Pennsylvania Humane Society.

But Raymar Dawson and Jason Ivey, two of the nearly two dozen day workers employed by EarthEcycle, reported a different story: electronics that were never tested, and literally dumped from collection containers to an abandoned lot in Homewood or former Levin's warehouse in Monroeville (photo shown above). Dawson and Ivey, who answered ads on Craigslist, were assured by Nixon that they would be hired on a full-time, permanent basis. However, after being paid cash for wages, the pair were not paid at all for their last two weeks of employment.

And what of the charities? The Western Pennsylvania Humane Society, one of the charities that partnered with EarthEcycle, has received only $10,000 of the $150,000 it says EarthEcycle owes them in donated electronic goods. The Make-A-Wish Foundation reports that it is continuing to collect electronic goods for EarthEcycle, but has not received any monies to date.

Watchdog group BAN initially raised the flag against EarthEcycle, which prompted the EPA and the DEP to look into BAN's allegations. EarthEcycle is now facing charges for violation of hazardous material management regulations for the treatment, management, and exportation of hazardous materials.

Among the charges is that EarthEcycle exported used computer equipment overseas and failed to mark shipping containers and documentation as containing hazardous material; improperly disposing of hazardous material; and failing to notify the EPA that it was exporting the material overseas for re-use.

Nixon and EarthEcycle have 30 days to answer the EPA's charges and must also provide a detailed plan to properly dispose of the electronics it has already collected. Not complying with the EPA's demands may result in penalties levied against EartheCycle of up to $37,000 a day.

This story is doubly sad to me because this was borne out of good intentions by the donors, who wanted to dispose of their electronics responsibly, and the charities, who wanted to do something good for the environment and make some needed revenue in the process.

So what's a person to do with discarded electronics--or other items that need to be re-cycled? The City of Pittsburgh has an excellent web site that provides details on how to recycle everything from your day-to-day trash like aluminum cans to old kitchen appliances and the carpeting you just pulled out from your living room. The city also offers free composting classes, and provides a comprehensive list of all of the things you can recycle.

As far as electronic items go, the 2009 schedule for hard-to-recycle items outlines the different drop off locations. The program is in cooperation with the EPA, and does charge a fee for collecting electronic items. But to me, the fee is small compared to the peace of mind knowing that your cast-offs will be disposed of properly.

Tragedy at the Holocaust Museum

2009-06-10T15:26:00.008-04:00

Barely two months after Richard Pawlawski allegedly shot and killed three police officers here in Pittsburgh, it appears that another white supremacist has struck again.

The Associated Press has just released a story about a man who entered the Holocaust Museum in Washington, DC and opened fire into the crowd. Because this just occurred a few hours ago, details are still incomplete. But the AP did report that an individual described as an "elderly gentleman" opened fire into the crowded museum, which receives 1.7 million visitors every year. The assailant, using what was described as a rifle, exchanged gunfire with a museum security guard, and both are in critical condition.

The alleged shooter is James W. von Brunn, 89. Von Brunn was arrested and served more than six years in a federal prison for trying to kidnap members of the Federal Reserve Board. When arrested in 1981, he was found with a knife, gun, and a sawed-off shotgun.

Von Brunn has a web site associated with him that highlights (lowlights?) his book "Kill the Best Gentiles", which he describes as "a carefully documented treatise exposes the JEWS and explains what you must do to protect your White family." Other writings include "Hitler's Worst Mistake" and "Liars, Murderers, Rats, and Thieves," all diatribes against Jews, African-Americans, and other minority groups.

I discovered that the domain name of the website is registered to a Steve Reimink. Reimink, a supporter of presidential candidate Ron Paul, popped up on a number of websites concerning issues about illegal immigrants. Among those was an email to President Bush that said, in part: "We further demand that there not be any amnesty given to illegals, NO free services, no funding, no payments to and for illegal immigrants. We are fed up with the lack of action about this matter and are tired of paying for services to illegals." No word if Reimink was involved, or had knowledge of von Brunn's plans at the Holocaust Museum.

Because this happened in Washington, DC, literally just steps from the White House, that this will be a wake-up call that violence can happen anywhere, and that no one is really safe from people with weapons intending to do harm, all in the name of an extremist belief. I hope that some good can come of this, and that congress will pass gun legislation designed to prevent this from happening again.

I Need A Hug...And Perhaps a Gun

2009-06-01T21:38:00.008-04:00

Well, this week just keeps getting better and better, and to paraphrase my friend Lakeisha's catchphrase, I am definitely not feeling the love in the room.

In the "I should have seen this coming" category, the office manager at the CPA firm tells me that "she didn't want to tell me Friday" (why? why?), but "this is our slow time and we don't need you any more." Subtle, huh? Then she said, "you can work the rest of the day (gee thanks, since it's 3:45 and I leave at 5:30), or through tomorrow, or through the rest of the week. Whatever I want."

Whatever I want?! What I wanted was a #*$&#* job from you, not some conciliatory you-can-work-out-the-week making the same temp rate I got 12 years ago. It's still not clear how much longer I will be working beyond tomorrow. My plan is to milk as much time out of them as possible, since I'm now close to--hooray--becoming eligible for unemployment, and the more weeks of work I can rack up, the better.

This experience has taught me a number of things: saying you're a Christian is a helluva lot different than actually being one, don't take anyone at their word, don't agree to anything in return for future compensation, and --when you get mad, don't bring firearms to work.

Although for the last thing, this experience has given me greater insight into why disgruntled workers return to their former places of employment with a shotgun and a whole lot of bad attitude. I've got the attitude, but believe I am showing considerable restraint in not going to the sporting goods store for a gun.

Once I got the news it took me quite a while to email the prospective tenants, realtor, insurance broker, mortgage broker, and home inspector to let them know all bets are off and my home buying plans are on hold. So I can kiss that cute little house in Highland Park goodbye, unless a miracle happens and I get a job before someone comes and scoops up that house. But I'm not holding my breath.

One bright side is that now that I'm amongst the land of the unemployed, that gives me more time to hang out with my slacker friends, chief amongst them Nut Bar and newly-unemployed Tim and Gino (come back to Pittsburgh, we'll have slacker fun, you'll see). Yeah! I see movie days, music and drinking days, laying out in the grass doing nothing days...

This Oasis Was Just a Mirage

2009-06-01T12:04:00.004-04:00

Well, my job search continues. While the CPA firm is still in play (I’m still temping there) and as Tim, Nut Bar, my Mother, and everyone else points out, I am working, making money, and there are more positives than drawbacks there. But temping is not getting me a job, and momma needs a job so she can buy that pretty house in Highland Park!

When talks stalled at the CPA firm, I resumed (or rather, amped it up) my job search. And miraculously, I found an oasis in the desert of job searching—literally. It was a program director job at a company called Oasis and sounded suspiciously like what I did at PSVN: managed volunteers, managed programs, did most of the accounting functions, worked with community charity partners, and on and on it went. I wasn’t the only one who saw this déjà vu all over again: a former PSVN volunteer even mailed the job description to me.

It appears that this is one oasis that just merely a mirage. I sent in my resume and the next week got a call from the Executive Director, who asked me when a good time would be to come in. She suggested 3:00 p.m. on Thursday, and when I asked if a later time might be available, she suggested 4:15 p.m. on Friday.

Friday came and I got to Oasis’ office and told the receptionist who I was and why I was here. A disembodied voice called out, “Your interview was yesterday,” and out comes the Executive Director. After I insisted it was Friday and she insisted it was Thursday, we were at a bit of a stalemate. I said I was sorry multiple times. I suggested that we might find another date and time, and she firmly refused. Three times. I wished her well in her candidate search and left.

My being upset and nearly in tears turned to anger, I’d have to admit. My mother will tell you I have the best memory of anyone she knows. I admittedly have more stress going on (aforementioned house and other things I’m afraid I won’t be discussing on a blog) than usual, but after the “hall of shame” bus ride post-non-interview I consulted my notes. There, plain as day, was “Friday” written in, with the time. But these days, that and two bucks will get you a coffee at Starbuck’s.

But as Tim and my Mom pointed out, do I really want to work for someone who doesn’t even allow for the possibility that she might be wrong? I think I’d feel like working with a jail warden who believes all inmates should serve their time and that second chances are not a possibility. My mother called her Cruella Deville, a description I rather like.

So it’s back to hitting the pavement, working at the CPA firm and looking for a job. Keep your fingers crossed that my little house in Highland Park will still be available after this craziness is over.

What's Worse: A Self-Admitted Snake in the Grass, or Hypocrites Cloaked in Christianity?

2009-05-21T13:48:00.005-04:00

I once worked at a place where shortly after I started, people began warning me about the Executive Director. "He lies," one co-worker whispered. "Don't believe a word he says," confided another. While the ED, whom I'll call John had the reputation of being a bit of a snake charmer, he was the first one to admit all his flaws, including the snake charming bit. So for me, his candor was refreshing and we always got along great--because I knew what I was dealing with and he wasn't pretending to be something he wasn't.

Fast forward to my current situation. As many of you know, I have been working for over two months at a company. What started as four-week temp job as a way to make a little money quickly turned into a very enjoyable experience. My direct superior is a former minister who acts more like Jolly Old St. Nick than an imperious clergy member. We immediately bonded over inane trivia and he appreciated (his words) my sharp mind and quick wit.

About a month into the temp job, he and I began having informal talks about my joining the company as an employee. I named my salary requirements, and he didn't balk. My temp contract was extended and St. Nick told me that the company would pay me a differential in salary because he said "if we tell the temp firm to raise the rate by $3, you'd probably get 25 cents of that." The way we left it, we were going to get through May 15th (end of their busy season) and then ink a deal.

In my glee of finally nearing the finish line with this job search, I got to work looking for a new house, which I found. I began showing my house to prospective tenants. I began the paperwork to get pre-approved for a mortgage.

Last Friday, St. Nick takes me to lunch and tells me that the company wants to hire me and wants to offer me a salary -- a range $10-15,000 less than what we had last talked about. It seems they don't have the money, and apparently never had the money. Next, they offered me a consulting contract, knowing full well I wanted full-time employment. "We thought since you file a Schedule C anyway," the President said (WHAT? Since when do I file a Schedule C?), "that you could work for us for 3 months as a contractor."

This whole time, the organization had been smugly patting itself on the back because they never signed a contract with the temp agency. Ergo, in their mind, they don't owe them any money. As you might imagine, the temp agency had a different idea and is now demanding money. The last time we met, the President said, "You know, if we have to pay them a fee, it will come out of the budget for this position (i.e., out of the pathetic amount they've offered me, or will completely scrap the differential they promised to pay me)."

Now, this is a for-profit company, and I expect there to be a little lyin' and schemin' along the way. But this company happens to loudly advertise itself as a "Christian-based" organization. Christian based? Christian based! What Would Jesus Do, indeed. I suspect he's spinning in his grave, with people donning the cloak of Christianity to act in what I can only characterize as un-Christian-like.

The negotiations are still going on, and of course I'm looking for another job. But whenever they're done dithering and actually offer me an employment contract, I may just take their miserable job, work the 90 day trial, close on my house, and then get the Hell out of Dodge. And I think Jesus would understand--and may even forgive me. The "Christians" are on their own, though.

I Bet You're as Happy About This As I am

2009-05-11T13:51:00.007-04:00

I have not been following the work on the new casino over on the North Shore, but fortunately for me Nut Bar has and brought me up to speed yesterday at brunch. As you all may know, the original developer's financing fell through, but--no surprise--another organization stepped up with funding and they will be opening the newly-christened Rivers Casino in early August.

Today the Post-Gazette ran a story (it must have been a slow news day) about the first delivery of slot machines--whoo-hoo! Altogether there will be 3,000 slot machines, with nearly half being penny or two-cent slot machines--perhaps a nod to all of the senior citizens who will be making a beeline to the casino, clutching the proceeds from their social security checks.

The Rivers Casino will also have the dubious distinction of also having the most expensive slot machine in the state, accepting a $500 wager, so some sad sack will be able to empty out his bank account even faster!

If having slot machines in Pittsburgh isn't bad enough, you know the day will come (probably shortly after they open) that they want to add table games, especially since their competition, Wheeling Downs, already have table games.

Fortunately the politicos have toned down their rhetoric proclaiming that casino revenue will slash property taxes. But the elephant in the room that no one is talking about is all of the negative aspects of having a casino in Pittsburgh: gambling addiction, increased crime, organized crime, prostitution, and God knows what else--all taking place next to two popular sports arenas. Pittsburgh Pirates fan, meet the neighborhood prostitute. Steelers fan, meet the area mafia don.

If you've never been to a casino, they're noisy, smoking, with the smell of flop sweat in the air. You can make it as "old time country club-y" as you want, but it won't cover the sense of desperation on the look of the senior yinzer faces. Because everyone knows the house always wins.

Updates, Part Deux

2009-05-05T12:30:00.007-04:00

In my haste to put together my last post, I forgot these updates:

Allegheny County District Attorney Stephen Zappala recently announced that his office will seek the death penalty for the brutal killing of three police officers allegedly caused by Richard Poplawski. Poplawski, who was reportedly on suicide watch in prison, has been recently transferred to another area of the prison, but wisely has not been moved with the general population, where I suspect he might likely have a close encounter with a shiv.

I think a careful examination of the case is warranted to determine if the death penalty is appropriate. I know many people are opposed to the death penalty. My opinion is that in certain instances, it is appropriate: when there is clear and compelling evidence that the person on trial is the person who murdered; when the crime was pre-meditated, when the crime is particularly brutal, and when the victim is particularly vulnerable, such as a child.

There seems to be little doubt that Poplawski did the shooting. It also appears that the act was premeditated, as evidenced by his donning a Kevlar vest. And while it is possible that Poplawski could have had a diagnosed or undiagnosed history of mental health issues (such as depression), currently there is no evidence to suggest that he was insane at the time of the shootings. It remains to be seen if Poplawski expresses remorse, or states his apologies to the families of the victims. Based on the statements of his friends and his public statements (via web postings), this doesn’t seem likely.

Another court-related matter was the failure of the State House bill limiting the use of cell phones while driving. The Bill was narrowly defeated, and the House compromise the State House came up with is giving State Troopers the right to fine those individuals Troopers witness driving in an unsafe manner while talking on a cell phone.

I shouldn’t have been surprised that the right-leaning panelists on “Off Q” were against the bill and limiting the use of cell phones – but I was. Professional political consultant Bill Green suggested that instead of regulating this, we ask drivers to “exercise some common sense.” Bill, I hate to break it to you, but if drivers were exercising common sense, we wouldn’t have legislators introducing bills like this.

I’ll reiterate my original statement and say that I am against all use of cell phones while driving, but understand that this is a rather extreme position and would support a bill (like the one that was just defeated) limiting cell phone use to the hands-free kind. It has nothing to do with taking away people’s rights, or trying to play Big Brother, it has to do with providing a safe driving experience for all. I wish people could exercise common sense and not talk on the phone, eat, put on mascara, etc. while driving, but people can’t. So while I’m not thrilled with the State House compromise, maybe hitting drivers with a fine will be a step in the right direction.

Updates on Earlier Posts

2009-04-24T14:56:00.005-04:00

Hello Faithful Readers (all 2 of you!) -- I thought I would do a post that is a follow-up to some of the topics from earlier posts.

Bajan pop singer Rhianna is no longer dating hip-hop artist Chris Brown after Brown allegedly assaulted her. Rhianna is cooperating with Los Angeles Police and the District Attorney's Office while they build a case against her former paramour. Brown pled not guilty at an April 6th hearing related to the matter. The scuttlebutt is that Rhianna's attorney is working with the District Attorney's office to work out a plea agreement, but nothing has been settled as of yet.

Chris Brown has moved on in the romantic department, now dating a college co-ed he knew from his growing up days in Virginia. Let's hope she knows karate... (ooh I didn't just say that!).

Michael Phelps has also moved on since his pot-smoking picture came out. My prediction that part of his "rehab" would be finding Jesus hasn't come true, but he did have a confession of sorts when he went on the Today show with Matt Lauer. While Lauer isn't exactly associated with hard-hitting interviews, he did put Phelps on the spot when Phelps said his canned "I made a mistake, it was dumb, I've learned from it" blah blah blah. Lauer played back the last time Phelps got into trouble, when he got arrested in 2004 (at the age of 19) for a DUI and he said almost verbatim the same thing. Well, at least he's got consistently on his side.

Phelps' images remains conspicuously abscent from Subway's web site and advertising campaign, despite being on the payroll as an endorser. Omega, the uber expensive watch maker, recently hired Phelps as a spokesman. Too bad it's not "takes a licking, but keeps on kicking" Timex...

Recently I expressed my disgust when Ravenstahl claimed not to have any time to devote to a debate with co-candidates Patrick Dowd and Carmen Robinson when KDKA postponed the planned debate due to a scheduling conflict.

I'd like to think I had something to do with this (I'm sure I didn't), but WTAE was able to put together a debate amongst the three candidates that was broadcast live April 20th. Unfortunately, I didn't know about the re-scheduled event so I missed it, but from what I understand from Chris Potter's piece in this week's City Paper as well as Jon Delano's report on kdka.com, both opponents tried hard to beat up Ravenstahl, but Ravenstahl was equal to the challenge. You can say a lot about Ravenstahl, but one thing that is consistent is his inflappability on the debate podium.

While all sides tried to make swipes toward each other (I heard Dowd was on the attack, showing greater strength than in recent history), no clear debate winner emerged. Judging from all of the Ravenstahl "get er done" signs in my neighborhood, it seems unlikely that Dowd or Robinson have any chance of beating him. But we'll see come election day who emerges the victor.

That's all for now!

And Here I Thought He Never Met a Camera He Didn't Like...

2009-04-13T18:53:00.011-04:00

I've made no bones about how I feel about Luke Ravenstahl as Mayor. One of the things that has particularly annoyed me about him is that you can count on him to be arm in arm with any actress that happens to visit Pittsburgh (Sarah Jessica Parker, Sienna Miller, etc.), at any parade (or late night talk show), at any big sporting event (U.S. Open, Steelers games, etc.), and seemingly any place where filming was taking place. Look up "media whore" in the dictionary and you'll likely see a big picture of Ravenstahl.

But it seems he's found a camera he doesn't like: at any mayoral debate, one of which was scheduled to take place on KDKA last Wednesday evening. KDKA postponed the debate, citing logistical difficulties in airing the memorial event for the fallen police officers and also wanting to put "some time between the coverage of this emotional story and the debate." However, KDKA steadfastly denies that the debate was canceled: "It was our intention to postpone the debate and reschedule it, not to cancel it." (italics mine)

Now according to today's article in the Post-Gazette, Ravenstahl's camp said there wasn't time in Ravenstahl's schedule to fit it in. Patrick Dowd, the City Councilman who's running against Ravenstahl, scoffed at this excuse, saying, "I have a busy schedule. I have five children. My wife has a job. I have a job. Who's he kidding that he doesn't have enough time?" Dowd pointed to Ravenstahl's having time to meet with potential campaign funders, while accusing him of not attending community-oriented meetings. He added "that a mayor who has never run in a contested primary is using last week's tragedy to avoid a discussion about public safety and other critical issues facing our city is an absolute outrage."

Ravenstahl responded with both guns blazing: "I find [Dowd's] comments disgusting, offensive, and completely out of line. Pittsburgh deserves an apology. Shame on you, Patrick."

Ravenstahl can name call all he wants, but this is the second time he has ducked out of a debate this election season. Last month, the Post-Gazette invited Ravenstahl to participate in a town hall-style debate and he declined the invitation (maybe he heard Rihanna was in town?); Dowd accepted the P-G's invitation.

I think Dowd should get campaign t-shirts (or pins) printed saying "Where's Luke?" sort of like the "Where's Waldo?" artwork, because it seems that this is one camera Ravenstahl is fighting hard to avoid.

Pittsburgh Dance Alloy Theatre is Exposed

2009-04-07T12:06:00.002-04:00

In many ways, Pittsburgh is an embarrassment of riches, and I sometimes forget how lucky we are for having such a vibrant arts scene. Last night I was reminded of this as I traveled over to the Hazlett Theatre for Dance Alloy Theatre’s Exposed.

Maybe it was immaturity, or shallowness, or just pure laziness, but when I was younger, I was not a fan of the more abstract—be it music, dance, or visual art. I wanted everything spelled out for me, I wanted to see something and immediately get it.

Now, while the more abstract may not always necessarily be my first choice, over the years I’ve come to appreciate the talent that goes into it, and how we can all bring our own personal repertoires into the story.

Artistic Executive Director Beth Corning did such a good job greeting the audience and telling us a bit about the three pieces and reminded us, simply and eloquently, that sometimes dance doesn’t necessarily have a story. Or perhaps one story, because it’s about anything viewers want it to be, to conform to what they’re feeling, or have experienced, or their viewpoints.

Of the three pieces, Beth’s 4-2 Men was the most linear story – about men who were puppets, constrained by hooded puppet masters. Then the puppets had the opportunity to cut the cord, so to speak, and experience love, freedom, and manipulation themselves.

The final performance of the evening was also a world premiere by an African émigré Nora Chipaumire who provided a piece involving angels. The work was ethereal and primal and soft but very powerful. The performance was paired with original music that completely complemented the dance and brought the mood from somber to soaring.

I was reminded of our embarrassment of riches here in Pittsburgh, and how Dance Alloy is such a shining example of that. Exposed has completed its run, but anyone interested in Dance Alloy should go to their next event in mid-April. It will feature new works in progress, and the five dollar admission (yowsa!) includes a wine and cheese reception, too.

A Colorful Visit to the Hospital

2009-04-05T17:51:00.007-04:00

Today I went on a tour of the new Children's Hospital, which many of you know is one block from my house. Those of us in the neighborhood have been living in a construction site for so long (about six years altogether) that there was some doubt that this day would ever come.

But they parted the "under construction" yellow tape and let residents take a self-guided tour. I've never minced words about the exterior of the facility: it is, in one word, hideous. To my mind, it looks like the builders cobbled together leftover material from old construction sites and slapped it on random parts of the building.

The new, hulking physical plant sends out an audible, low-rumbling constant drone that makes it difficult to enjoy my backyard any more. And atop this physical plant (it's about 5 stories high, above me on the hill) are lights that turn different primary colors. Combined with the constant rumbling, it's a bit much. Apparently others share my opinion, as reported in the recent P-G story.

As I said to Nut Bar, on some level you realize this is a big facility--its footprint is a city block--but you don't completely comprehend its enormity until you actually tour the building. Visitors were ushered into the first floor, where the emergency room and related services will be, then we were whisked up to the 6th floor. Visitors had a chance to tour all but the second floor, but by the time I made it down to the third floor, I was on sensory overload.

There's no doubt that this is a children's hospital; it's a bright, very colorful facility. A combination of volunteers and hospital staff acted as docents, and they enthusiastically showed you "their" portion of the tour. Everything is state of the art, from the medication delivery system to the monitors where parents can track a child's progress, be it in the ER, the OR, or the post-surgical recovery areas.

I have no doubt that this is going to be a crowning jewel not just for UPMC but for Pittsburgh as well. They've designed this hospital to be the best trauma center in the area, and the best transplant center in the world. There's no doubt that this greatly enhanced facility is going to bring people from all over for surgeries, transplants, and the like. They did an excellent job with the layout; there was a great deal of thought given to the patient and parent experience.

However, after the years of jackhammering, dust, and traffic interruptions, I can see this neighborhood changing in many tangible ways. From the sixth floor of the hospital there is a beautiful vista of Bloomfield and downtown. You get the sense that the designers deliberately chose this particular perspective to show that the hospital is part of a neighborhood. But I think that for me the traffic, noise, and constant hubbub will not offset the positive benefits. I'll give you all an update post-May 2nd, which is when "opening day" will be.

Dark Day in Pittsburgh

2009-04-04T22:47:00.011-04:00

This morning, I met my friend Steve over at the Quiet Storm, which turned out to be a wonderful antidote to the mini-hangover from the night before (that's another story). Waiting for Steve, the waiter came over with my much-needed cup of coffee, and then he stopped to talk to friends sitting at an adjacent table. He asked them whether or not they heard about the hostage situation over in Stanton Heights. "It's really big," he said. "They've got SWAT vans there and helicopters all over the place."

Then Steve arrived and the comment I just heard was pushed aside for breakfast and conversation with Steve about Lost, his 50 dates in the last 6 months, and his running the half-marathon this year (you go, boy!). I shared my upcoming likely new job news, who I've been drinking aforementioned cocktails with, and plans to buy a new house.

Then after some errand running I returned home to hear the awful news: the (alleged) premeditated murder of three Pittsburgh police officers on an ordinarily quiet and peaceful street in Stanton Heights.

According to the AP story, the alleged murderer, Richard Poplawski, 22, and his mother got into a domestic dispute. His mother fled to the basement and called 911 for help. Apparently this is exactly what Poplawski wanted, and anticipating the police's arrival, strapped on a bulletproof vest and armed himself with an AK-47 assault weapon.

The ordeal left three police officers dead, one wounded, and a fifth injured; Poplawski was shot in the leg during the four-hour exchange of gunfire.

While reports from friends express shock and disbelief at Poplawski's behavior, a troubling story is emerging of an individual who clearly had a long history with anger and authority. Expelled from North Catholic High School, he got his GED and enlisted with the Marines. There Poplawski was dishonorably discharged while still in basic training after throwing a cafeteria tray at another trainee. A Stanton Heights resident described Poplawski as violent, often fighting with neighbors: "He was just one of those kids that [neighborhood residents] knew to stay clear from."

After being jilted by his girlfriend, he moved to Florida and lived there a few years before returning to Pittsburgh, where he lived with his mother and grandmother. He got a job at a glass factory, but was laid off in early 2009.

Poplawski fancied himself a politico, and recently co-produced a weblog with a friend. It was likely during this time that Poplawski became convinced that the election of Barack Obama meant the end of what he considered to be his right to bear arms and his freedoms.

Somewhere along the line he collected a mini-arsenal of guns: besides the aforementioned AK-47, he also reportedly owned several powerful rifles and handguns, including a 357 magnum.

Being raised in a rural county, I grew up in an area where many people hunted, and for a lot of kids, getting their first gun and hunting with their dads on the opening day of deer season was a rite of passage. I understand everyone's right to bear arms; I understand it's protected by the constitution.

But I find it incredibly hard to believe that the founding fathers envisioned a country where a person can go out and buy military-style assault weapons designed not to take down a deer, but to eviscerate a human being, or to be able to own multiple, high-caliber guns. To allow people who have a history of violence, a history of mental health issues, to buy a gun about as casually as one can walk into a 7-11 and buy a pack of gum.

A similarly sad and disturbing story occurred earlier this week when Jiverly Wong, a recently-laid off worker returned to his former place of employment in Binghamton, New York, and began shooting people. Like Poplawsky, he was wearing body armour, brought multiple guns, and was heavily armed, killing 13 people and wounding several more.

Every time a tragedy like this happens, it seems like the story gets a lot of press, but from a preventative standpoint nothing is done. Everyone sat around and wrung their hands after the tragedy at Virginia Tech, but not one thing from a legislative aspect was done to change the gun laws in this country.

I hope that Obama uses these recent tragedies as an opportunity to address this and once and for all put stricter gun laws on the books--including tougher restrictions on firearm applications, and a ban on assault weapons like the AK-47 rifle that just took the lives of three of Pittsburgh's own men in blue.

Two Steps Forward, One Step Back?

2009-03-30T13:41:00.005-04:00

A few weeks ago on craigslist I saw a posting for an experiment at Pitt. For two hours of your time, you join a small group, discuss politics, and then receive a $25 Giant Eagle gift card. Sounded to me like pretty easy money.
The group I participated in met last night: amongst the college senior, recent college grad, and I was an older woman. I would guess her age to be in her late 50’s or early 60’s, but it was difficult to determine exactly because she wore huge, “Jackie-O” style sunglasses and a blonde, Pamela Anderson type wig, ripped jeans, and a black hoodie emblazoned with a silver cartoon voodoo doll stuck with pins.

The meeting facilitator passed out the questions we as a group were to discuss, which centered around race and the latest presidential election. The political and racial lines became quickly drawn between the three of us (college student, recent grad, and me) and this older woman.

I initially thought that because this was an experiment taking place in the Sociology Department of Pitt, this woman was a plant. The wig, the sunglasses, the nature of her remarks, it had to be a disguise, a jokey caricature of what people perceive a racist to be. Surely she was brought into the group only as a provocation to see what our reaction would be.

Then, as she went from one tangential, stream-of-consciousness rant to another, I realized that this was no plant at all, but a person who genuinely believed the venom that came out of her mouth. Her remarks included her belief that whites are the superior race; now that “that man” is in the white house, she fears that “those people will take over everything." She expressed her outrage towards a neighbor who has a black boyfriend. On and on it went, for nearly two hours, until the Facilitator finally stopped the experiment and escorted the woman out of the building.

While I thought the group showed an unbelievable amount of restraint, the Facilitator and the three of us were incredulous. For me, what initially began as amazement and amusement, quickly gave way to the sad realization that this was no joke: as demonstrated by this woman, racism is alive and well.

I and millions of Americans swelled with pride on inauguration day to witness an African-American man being sworn in as President, and for that moment thought we had come so far as a nation. We have come far, but as the woman brought home the point so dramatically, we still have such a long way to go.

Have You Heard the Latest? Gossip Maven Gets the Axe.

2009-03-23T13:52:00.007-04:00

When I think of Gossip Lady (no, not the vapid show, Gossip Girl), I always think of Liz Smith. With her trademark southern charm and every-hair-always-in-place blond pageboy, Smith is an institution, and like her colleague Army Archerd, her name became synonymous with gossip.

Smith covered all the salacious gossip fit to print for over 33 years in her regular column for the New York Post, which ran in syndication in over 70 publications nationwide. For many years, Smith was the one celebrities ran to, telling their secrets, and under her gentle--but persistent--questioning, Smith was famous for getting the dish that others only dreamed about.

But this year the Post opted not to renew Smith's annual contract and on February 26, it ran the last column. Smith reacted to the news with her usual aplomb: "I'm very sorry that that has come to an end, and that I wasn't valuable enough for them to keep me on," she stated in Sally Kalson's recent column.

While Smith worked in the business of scandal and titillation, she was a class act. It's sad to see the old guard taking a backseat to the more in-your-face antics of TMZ. With both a web site as well as a popular syndicated TV show, TMZ has crews staked out at airports, restaurants, stores, and even the houses of the rich and famous. Their stick-a-camera-in-the-face style of reporting with the crew shouting inane questions has become the de rigour style of gossip mongering.

While Smith will no longer be seen in the pages of newspapers, she will continue to do her own brand of gossiping online at Women on the Web's web site, and Post contract or not, the 86-year-old Smith shows no signs of slowing down. All I can say is, you dish, girl!

What's Next, Jimmy Choo 101?

2009-03-22T16:46:00.002-04:00

I really hate to pick on CMU, it being my alma mater and all, but today the Post-Gazette--on Page One above the fold, no less--featured a story about a new course being offered at Carnegie Mellon. Is it "Financial Accounting (and How to Avoid Ponzi Schemes)"? Nope. How about "Environmental Engineering With Green Technology"? No way. "Robot Technology and Human Interaction"? Not a chance.

It's (drum roll, please) "Sneakerology 101", or as I call it, the 101st reason not to give my alma mater any money. The Post-Gazette article enthusiastically reports about the newest course offering, "delv[ing] into the impact of sneakers on identity and culture."

Now, I love my Chuck Taylor's just as much as the next person, but a course solely (sorry I couldn't resist) devoted to what's essentially gym shoes? I guess the joke is on me and everyone else who thinks this is completely ridiculous, because students are lining up around the block to take it.

Students in the class, self-labeled "sneakerheads", lap up such inciteful information "as early hip-hop roots,...shoe design and technology, and the effect of boutiques and limited-edition releases." Students' final assignment is to design their own sneaker--and write a description about it. And I thought Foucault was tough!

Field trips include such intellectually-stimulating adventures as pre-dawn trips to stand in line at Foot Locker to assess...a new shoe release. Class debates included which Air Jordan sneaker Michael Jordan wore in the 1985-1986 season. Now that's useful information to banter about in those pesky I'm-about-to-graduate-and-need-a-job interviews!

I suppose the only logical next step is to put the shoe on the other foot, so to speak, and give the ladies a chance to learn all about their favorite footwear: the high heel. I'm imagining field trips to Nordstrom to view the fall line of Manolo Blahnik's, stimulating lectures by physicians who discuss bunions and hammer toes, and viewings of "Sex and the City" to examine the idle lives of rich thirty-something women and their shallow materialistic shoe fetishes. Any takers?

Brother, Can You Spare $65 Million?

2009-03-17T17:23:00.014-04:00

Carnegie Mellon University has a reputation--and a very effective PR machine perpetuating it--for being one of the top-class business schools in the country (if not the world). So this is why I'm continuing to scratch my head in amazement at how the financial wizards at CMU could have been duped into a Ponzi scheme.

This Ponzi scheme was not with the now-incarcerated Bernard Madoff, but rather with Westridge, an investment firm based in New York City. According to a recent article in the Post-Gazette, one or more of CMU's trustees knew the principals at Westridge. With cronyism firmly established, CMU proceeded to invest nearly $65 million with Westridge.

As many of you know, I am an alumna (and former employee) of Carnegie Mellon. I actually took a leave of absence from my secure, fairly well-paying job to attend school full time. In hindsight, it was the best decision I made: I received a superb education there.

Amongst all of the book-learning I did, one of the best bits of wisdom I learned at CMU was this: don't take anything at face value. Ask questions, put things in a context. To quote Ronald Reagan: "trust, then verify."

Perhaps the powers-that-be at CMU need to return to the classroom to learn this lesson again, as it was long on trust and short on verifying. Westridge sent rosy financial statements to CMU, which apparently CMU believed without question. CMU continued to invest money, perhaps blinded by greed, seemingly not asking about the veracity of these reports.

So now they've lost over $65 million, and on February 20 they filed suit against Westridge. This whole mess has become the big elephant in the room that CMU is not talking about. Nary a peep on their web site, no public comment about this whole mess.

Instead, the CMU Fundraising Machine wasted no time plotting a new scheme as to how to get their coffers re-filled--by their alumni, of course! Last week I received a passionate letter from CMU. In it they talked about "this difficult economic climate" and imploring me to give "whatever I can."

Instead of giving money, I'm choosing instead to give some advice. So CMU, here it is: rather than send alumni letters asking them for money, how about a letter with an explanation and/or update about the CMU/Westridge situation, and a great big mea culpa for the whole thing. And throwing in some assurances that they'll make sounder financial investment choices in the future.

And in the meantime, I'll be making my own sound investments...for myself.

Art or Eyesore?

2009-03-14T12:18:00.008-04:00

As I mentioned in yesterday's post, the law caught up with a man police describe as the "second most wanted graffiti artist" (I guess that makes him the Hertz of local graffiti artists). Last year police caught Ian Debeer spray painting a bridge in Etna, and during a subsequent search of his house police discovered and seized dozens of cans of spray paint, specialty nozzles, and photos of his "HERT" graffiti tag.

Since last year, detectives have been gradually building a case against Debeer, matching 165 of the photos found at Debeer's apartment to graffiti sites all over Allegheny County. During an arraignment concerning the incident in Etna, police arrested Debeer for 73 counts of criminal mischief. All told, Debeer caused over $200,000 worth of damage to local government, commercial, and privately-owned properties.

According to an article in the Post-Gazette, Pittsburgh is becoming the unofficial graffiti capital of the country, where barely-out-of-their-teens like Debeer come to Pittsburgh, tag as many buildings as they can, all in an effort to gain street cred. While the city has a Graffiti Task Force, apparently it has upped the ante of these graffiti artists. Evidently, the more police investigate the matter, the better the street cred amongst fellow artists.

Police estimate that an astounding 65 graffiti crews with as many as 650 individuals are spray painting all over the city. They are organized and carefully plan their attack, armed with specially-designed equipment to help them do the job. It seems no building, no bridge, no concrete surface, no matter how difficult to access, is off limits to them.

On one hand, I see young individuals with enormous, albeit misguided, creative potential. I'd love to know where their parents fit into the equation. Creative kids should be at the Art Institute, studying art and learning how to apply their talent towards a creatively rewarding, legal means of employment. These graffiti artists are artists: they take pride in their work, they find venues that have maximum exposure, and spend thousands of dollars in supplies and equipment to ensure that they have what they need to do the job.

On the other hand, graffiti artists apply their art to buildings that don't belong to them, without the permission of the building owners. Tagging is illegal, and taggers give police and the property owners the middle finger every time they tag a building. Painting over or removing a graffiti tag takes time and money--if the tag can even be effectively removed.

I wish I had a simple solution, but unfortunately this is a complex issue. I understand both sides of the argument. Other cities have adopted a "free wall" zone--where graffiti artists can tag without the fear of punishment. However, most reports I have read seem that free wall programs have been more a failure than a success. Free wall program administrators explain that because part of the tagging experience is the thrill of doing something illegal, graffiti artists say that tagging on a free wall is not as fulfilling. Tagging on a free wall makes them feel like they are conforming, something contrary to the credo of taggers.

There are several types of coatings that can be applied to walls and other graffiti-prone surfaces. How about making this product available to property owners especially vulnerable to tagging at a discount? I think that arrested graffiti artists should be required to remove or paint over the tag, then apply the anti-graffiti compound--all at the expense of the arrested individual.

Arrested individuals who pay restitution to the owners of the tagged buildings, who serve their jail sentences without getting into trouble while incarcerated, perhaps go through some group therapy to confront and talk about their wanting to tag, could become eligible for special training, perhaps through a cooperative program with the Art Institute or Carnegie Mellon University. Those recently released from prison go into a halfway house (or wear an ankle bracelet) where they continue to be monitored, but now also go to school and perhaps get a part-time job that goes towards their restitution.

I don't think adding more police is the answer--that will only provoke an escalation on the side of the taggers. The solution has to include dialogue with the taggers and programs that both punish taggers for their illegal behavior as well as providing incentives and opportunities to steer their energies in a more construction--and legal--way.

Doggy Downers & the Wrong Kind of Little Hug

2009-03-13T18:46:00.018-04:00

I was going to write about the Pittsburgh graffiti artist that got arrested today for causing nearly a quarter million dollars' worth of damage, but then I saw two stories on the newswire making up an eerily similar theme. Coincidence? I'll let you decide.

First, in a case perhaps inspired by the movie Nine to Five, a women in Arkansas was arrested today for allegedly putting tranquilizers in her boss' coffee. While Lily Tomlin's character in Nine to Five accidentally added rat poison to her boss' cup of coffee ("It [the rat poison box] looks just like the Skinny & Sweet--except for the little skull and crossbones on the box"), this time, it appears to be no accident.

Perhaps as a means to defend her actions, the woman reportedly stated that her boss, a veterinarian at the animal shelter where they both worked, needed to "chill out". Apparently she thought that a large dose of tranquilizers might do the trick.

Also reported today by the AP, ten children in Arkansas became sick when they drank windshield washer fluid. This happened at a Little Rock daycare center where the owner of the daycare mistook the jug of washer fluid for a container of Kool-Aid and served it to the children. Talk about putting a brand new spin on the warning "don't drink the Kool-Aid".

Fortunately, only one of the children remains hospitalized, and is reported to be in good condition. The very distraught owner of the daycare has voluntarily forfeited her daycare license, pending an investigation into the matter.

I've always thought when I saw those "Blueberry" Little Hugs drinks looked like windshield washer fluid--they're the exact same shade of blue, so for me it was no surprise that this sort of mix-up happened.

I don't have any plans to travel to Arkansas, but my suggestion to those who are are to make your own coffee and avoid any blue-tinted drinks.

Bernie, Welcome To Your New Home!

2009-03-12T19:43:00.010-04:00

Bernard Madoff appeared in court today and pled guilty to swindling more than half a billion dollars from his clients. As reported in a story by the Associated Press, applause broke out in the courtroom when Judge Chin revoked bail and court officials led Madoff away in handcuffs.

Many legal pundits and victims believe that some of the monies landed at the feet of Madoff's wife, pointing to the Manhattan penthouse and other properties deeded in her name. However, we might never know with absolute certainty where all of the money went--and where all of the seizable assets might be. This is because Madoff, who pled guilty without asking for or accepting any plea bargain, is not required to cooperate with the Attorney General's office.

The press has reported on some of the victims of Madoff's Ponzi scheme, including individuals, trusts, and charitable foundations. According to the AP story, many of Madoff's victims were Jewish, and trusted Madoff because he was Jewish also.

Perhaps most egrecious of Madoff's crimes was the fleecing Nobel Prize winner and Holocaust survivor Elie Wiesel. Allegedly Wiesel has been wiped out financially, both of his personal assets as well as the endowment of his charitable foundation. If ripping off one of this world's most highly regarded humanitarians doesn't put you in the express lane to the gates of hell, I don't know what will.

I'm sure it is little comfort to Wiesel and Madoff's other victims, but Madoff's accommodations are spartan at best. The (New York) Metropolitan Correction Center released information about Madoff's new digs, including the photo shown above. While it's not clear whether or not Madoff will share his cell with a roommate, it will certainly be a far cry from his recently-departed $7 million Manhattan penthouse. Described as "about the size of a closet", the 60 square foot cell contains the barest of accommodations: a bunk bed, small desk and stool, locker for personal items, and a sink and toilet. Here he will stay until his sentencing, which takes place in June.

It is my hope that once sentencing takes place and Madoff is transferred to his permanent prison location, that his accommodations remain as they are now. No "country club" prison, no kid glove handling, but a place as equally dark and dismal to the despair of his many victims.

Penn Brewing Saga Finally Resolved

2009-03-11T11:33:00.009-04:00

Penn Brewing's beer may now be produced in the eastern part of the state, but fans of its restaurant will be happy and relieved to know that the North Side eatery will continue operating.

Founded in 1986 by Tom Pastorius, Penn Brewing offered Pittsburgh its first taste of locally-made microbrew, made by an authentic German Brewmaster and distributed from its brewery on Vinial Street right on the North Side. Besides the brewery, the facility included the aforementioned Hofbrau restaurant that paired its many beer offerings with authentic German cuisine. The building housing the restaurant/brewery is a historic landmark built in the early 1900's (in what was then Deutchstown). The beer garden outdoor courtyard is paved with cobblestones constructed in the same period.

Both the beer and restaurant quickly became successful, winning many prestigious awards for its beer, most recently two medals at the Great American Beer Festival: a gold for its Kaiser Pilsner and a bronze for the more robust Oktoberfest.

Penn Brewing's successful enterprise spawned similar local microbrew/restaurants in the 1990's: Lawrenceville's Church Brew Works and the Strip's Valhalla and Foundry Ale Works. While Church Brew remains open, Valhalla and Foundry Ale Works have both shuttered: Valhalla is now the upscale wine bar/restaurant Eleven and Foundry Ale's site has morphed into offices for a local nonprofit.

Penn Brewing CEO Len Caric (Pastorius, retired in 2003, remains a financial stakeholder) revealed in an article in the Post-Gazette that plans had already been made to relocate main production to Lion Brewery in Wilkes-Barre. The switch became necessary when the North Side facility couldn't keep up with increasing demand. When production switched over to Lion in early 2009, the North Side site planned to focus its attention on developing additional varieties of beer, while continuing to operate the restaurant.

However, it seemed this plan was not to be, as Penn Brewing received some bad news in late 2008 from its landlord, E&O Partners. According to Caric, E&O increased the rent by 360%, increasing the cost per square foot as well as adding to the lease square footage (such as the outdoor beer garden and loading dock facilities) that had never been included in the square footage calculation.

However, thanks to efforts of many, including David Malone of E&O, Penn Brewing's Caric, and Northside Leadership Conference's Executive Director Mark Fatla, a new, five-year lease (with an option for a five-year extension) was recently inked. While the restaurant closed briefly, it re-opened March 3. And although most of the brewery equipment had been sold in anticipation of the closing, Caric stated in a March 1 news conference that he intends to rebuild the brewery and return to making beer onsite.

What you won't read in the press is how generous Penn Brewing has been to local charities. For PSVN's fundraisers as well as countless other charity fundraisers, Penn Brewing generously donated kegs of beer, which were always cheerfully delivered and set up by one of the Penn Brewing salespeople. Penn Brewing proved that with the right plan and a high-quality product, start-up companies can succed, and indeed thrive.

While I don't drink much Penn Pilner these days, it really would have been a shame to see Penn Brewing's operation completely come on the North Side. I'm glad that both sides were able to reach an agreement and that the I raise my glass to more beer and schnitzel over at Vinial Street. Salut!

Every Rose Has Its Thorn

2009-03-10T17:42:00.010-04:00

December 20, 1965: a day that will live in infamy. Not because a war began on this day, or an important person died, but rather the birth of a TV show type that now has America whipped into a frenzy. This date was the premier of a television show that became part of America's pop culture: The Dating Game.

For those needing a brush-up on the format, The Dating Game gave a woman a chance to ask three men cheeky questions and based on their answers (she was only able to hear and not see them), chose one to go on a date. This campy show was fun and provided harmless entertainment: everything was done with a wink and a nod, not taking itself too seriously. The format and premise of the show was simply a novel way to get on TV (good for the aspiring actor or actress) and maybe end up on a date.

Times have certainly changed. Fast forward 40 years and you'll see TV's gone from a relatively harmless game show to today's more slickly-produced reality shows, with the stakes escalating exponentially. Today's reality show contestants aren't merely seeking 15 minutes of fame and the chance at a date, they're looking for the love of their lives. And instead of competing against two other contestants, it's now more than two dozen.

Everyone loves a good love story, and when creating the reality show The Bachelor/Bachelorette, the producers must have thought they had a winning formula: to see a love story unfold is from beginning to end, and filming the process, including the most intimate of moments. You get to see the first hello, the first date, first kiss, first declaration of love, and finally, the moment everyone waits for, the proposal of marriage on bended knee.

In reality (no pun intended), the story is a lot less pure than that, when you have 25 women competing against one other for the aforementioned kiss, love talk, and marriage proposal. It's the yin to the love yang: the cat fights, and the manipulation, and the bitchiness, all done while trussed up in designer gowns and living in a palatial mansion in the Hollywood Hills.

Of course, Americans ate it up: picking and rooting for favorite contestants, analyzing every detail of the budding romances, and seeing, week after week, contestants being systematically eliminated, when the Bachelor offers roses to the women he wants to stay, while the rest get the boot. Eliminated contestants are each filmed in the obligatory "weeping in the limousine" scene as they drive away from the palatial mansion, the broken dream, crying in despair, "But we had a connection! We were perfect for each other! I could totally spend the rest of my life with him!"

Then, as the limo drives continues, despair then turns to anger: "I can't believe he didn't eliminate (insert name of the omnipresent bitchy girl here)! He doesn't know what a mistake he made. He's going to regret eliminating me--I was the best thing that ever happened to him!"

While this show is billed as a drama ("it's the most dramatic rose ceremony EVER!!!!), to me it's always been a comedy. Thirteen seasons of The Bachelor and four seasons of The Bachelorette have yielded exactly one marriage: not exactly great odds. One couple is reportedly still together, Bachelor and bass fishing champ--no, I'm not making this up--Byron and his ladee love, Mary. However, their future may now be less rosy since Mary was arrested about a year ago for battery against man-love Byron.

The latest scandale is centered on Jason Mesnick, the latest Bachelor incarnation. Deciding between his two final contestants was the brash brunette (and former Dallas Cowboy cheerleader) Melissa and the more demure, blonde Molly. In the most dramatic rose ceremony EVER, Jason dissed Molly, cried like a baby, then turned on the smiles two minutes later and proposed to Melissa.

Six weeks after aforementioned proposal, all is not well with Jason, who broke up with Melissa on national TV, and then, two minutes later, cozied up to formerly dissed Molly and asked for a second chance. Just last week Jason and Molly appeared together on TV and guess what: they're in love. Forever. And this time they mean it!

The entire idea of finding true love on a reality game show is ludicrous. One marriage out of 17 attempts (I'm not counting Jason and Molly as a success just yet) puts them on par with Survivor's "Boston Rob" and "Ambah"--and that wasn't even a show about dating.

All over America, people have been wringing their hands about Jason, villainizing him for his behavior. If there is a villain to the story, it is the producers. After seeing dismal ratings and outrage when The Bachelor/Bachelorette didn't come up with the money shot (the proposal, the bended knee, the promise of forever), you've got to figure they exerted none-too-subtle pressure on Jason to give them what they want and the viewers need. I appreciate his honesty, and his decision: to pursue a relationship--off camera, this time--with the girl he was ultimately attracted to. Good luck, you crazy kids!

Dok--or Just Dork?

2009-03-09T14:40:00.015-04:00

Do you remember a couple of years ago when rumors began swirling that Lynn Swann was running for governor? When the rumors started, my reaction, like many people's, was "Why do you think he's running?" "Is this a joke?" "What kind of experience does he have?" and "Just because he's a former Steeler doesn't make him qualified to govern a state."

The rumor turned out to be true, and I'm not sure what was the bigger shocker--that he actually launched a campaign and did so with a straight face, or the fact that he's a Republican.

About a week ago I heard a similiarly preposterous rumor, this time for the upcoming Pittsburgh Mayoral race. No, not a city councilperson, or the mayor of a small borough running in the race, but none other than someone connected to another Super Bowl champ, Franco Harris. This time it's Harris' son, Franco "Dok" Harris. The fact that he is under 30 and has no political experience isn't standing in the way of his Mayoral bid--he has his Dad's good Steelers mojo going for him!

Okay, it's not quite this bad. On paper, he has an impressive resume...educationally. He's a graduate of Princeton University and CMU's Tepper School of Business/Pitt Law School. His undergraduate degree from Princeton is in Politics, and at CMU/Pitt besides getting an MBA and a JD, he won multiple awards for his business planning and entrepreneurial skills.

But--book smarts does not a politician make: reading a book about politics is miles away from actually running for--and then governing as--Mayor of a large city.

According to the information provided on his disastrously-designed web site (Did he get a guy from craigslist to do it for him for free? I hope so, because if he paid real money for it, it's his first bad spending decision.), his only political experience is confined to student council as an undergrad. He never once volunteered for a political campaign, he has never interned for a congressperson or other political figure, and--most importantly--he's never held public office.

There's a little thing I'd like to share with Mr. Harris: it's called paying your dues. I hate to break it to you, but coming from a wealthy family, going to Ivy League schools, and being under 30 does not actually entitle or qualify you to become mayor. It comes from working on campaigns, starting out at the ground level, and learning about the political process as a participant, not as the candidate when the ink on your sheepskin is barely dry.

Good God, even Ravenstahl knows this: he may be under 30 and a former beeper salesman, but at least he comes from a political family, learned the business at the knee of his father, and then ran and served as a councilman before becoming mayor. We may scoff at his relative youth, but at least he held office before becoming mayor.

My advice, if I may be as bold as to offer Harris some advice, would be this: you have great academic experience and are clearly a smart guy. But: if you want a future in politics, you need follow in the footsteps of your idol, President Obama: be humble, learn from others by working in their campaigns, and then foray that experience into running for office, starting small. Swann was not taken seriously, and neither will you--and he's a beloved figure with Super Bowl rings dripping from his fingers!

Having no political experience and running your first campaign as Mayor is nothing short of political suicide. And you're too smart with too bright a future to have it all snuffed out by one very bad decision.

An Energy-Saving Plan You Can Sink Your Teeth Into

2009-03-07T16:53:00.006-05:00

Awhile back, I was watching an episode of Oprah that focused on decreasing your electricity use. The expert on the show talked about something I had not thought about: all of the appliances that use electricity even when they're "off".

It's a phenomenon that's called "Vampire Power"--appliances that use electricity even when you're not using them. When I first heard about this, I really thought this was much ado about nothing: you turn your TV off, and it's off, right? Well, not exactly. It seems that a lot of appliances, even when they are in the "off" position, are still drawing electricity, because they're in standby mode.

The expert on the Oprah show claimed that up to 25 percent of your electric usage was from this so-called "Vampire Power". This number sounded high to me, so I went to my old friend Wikipedia to see what they had to say about it. Wikipedia reported that the energy usage can reach up to 22 percent of all appliance consumption, and around 10 percent of total residential consumption--in other words, your electric bill will likely decrease by 10 percent if you completely turn off appliances with standby power.

So I tried a little experiment. Upstairs, I began turning off the power strip that connected the TV, VCR/DVD player, and cable box when I wasn't watching TV. I unplugged the clock-radio in the guest room. My boom box is unplugged when not being used.

Downstairs, I swapped out my ten year old desktop computer to my newly-acquired laptop computer, and turned off that power strip when the computer wasn't in use. I unplugged my programmable coffee maker unless I was making coffee and unplugged the stove (which had a built-in clock--which never worked right, anyway) when not in use. I also changed out the eight incandescent bulbs in my dining room to compact florescent lights (CFL's).

In the words of the late, great Monkees, I'm a believer! Consumption of electricity upstairs (yes, I have two electric meters in my house) has decreased 17 percent, even with the cold winter that we've had (and the furnace clicking on more often).

The big news, however, is consumption downstairs. My electric bill has decreased by a whopping 52 percent! Sure, the CFL's were expensive (specialty chandelier-sized bulbs cost about $6 each), but I've recouped this cost and then some in the six months or so that I've swapped them out.

If you want to take similar measures in your home, it's pretty easy. Generally speaking, anything with a remote and/or a built-in clock consumes electricity, even when it's off. Things such as lamps with an on/off switch don't consume electricity when turned to the off position. You can easily turn off appliances by using a power strip that has an on/off switch.

Of course, you can also do a lot of common sense things that also add up: take my lead and swap out your incandescent bulbs with CFL's. They last a long time (some of mine are nearly 10 years old) and consume a fraction of what an incandescent bulb does. Just remember that CFL's light is usually dimmer than incandescent, so opt for the highest wattage (you'll still save money). You can also (duh) turn lights off in rooms that aren't being used. If you like to leave a light on for home security's sake, get one of those timers so that it comes on and off only when it's dark.

And I think you'll see that these relatively small changes can add up to significant savings. And you'll be using less vampire power-bwaaahaaaahaaahaaahaaa!

No Build-A-Bear for These Two

2009-02-26T18:06:00.007-05:00

Well, it seems financial impropriety has hit two of Pittsburgh's biggest learning institutions, the University of Pittsburgh and my alma mater, Carnegie Mellon University. According to a recent article in the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, the two universities entrusted Westridge Capital Management with a combined $114 million. Apparently all of the money is gone, and both schools are suing Westridge's Paul Greenwood and Stephen Walsh of fraud. Boy, am I glad I didn't donate during the last alumni appeal!

Fraud--I'll say, since the two allegedly stole more than half a billion dollars from their clients. I'll also charge them with extremely bad taste, since their laundry list of purchases include Steiff teddy bears, some more than $80,000 each. Half a billion buys a lot of teddy bears, even $80,000 ones, as well as rare books, condos, cars, and gifts to current and former spouses.

Investigators are theorizing that Greenwood and Walsh devised a Ponzi scheme not unlike the now infamous case of Bernie Madoff. According to the P-G article, Mr. Greenwood told Pitt's assistant treasurer about four weeks ago that they had $2.8 billion under management--though that number is now in question. And on February 2nd, Pitt sent an additional $5 million to be invested.

I'm really torn deciding who should be blamed more: Westridge, for duping all of its clients, or Pitt and CMU, who were gullible enough to be duped (Isn't CMU's Tepper School of Business supposed to be one of the Top 10 Business Schools in the US?). But here's the bad news, latest news stories report that it is unlikely that Pitt or CMU will get even pennies back on the $114 million they invested.

I have to hand it to Greenwood and Walsh for completely going through half a billion dollars and having little or nothing to show for it--well done! Were you trying to do a remake of Brewster's Millions? Even when my beloved Independence Air went belly up and the bankruptcy court divvied up everything, I got back nearly two-thirds of what they owed me. Now I'm feeling not so bad giving a start-up airline some of my money. At least I got enough back for one of those fancy teddy bears--albeit the Build-A-Bear kind.

All Atwitter about Twitter

2009-02-24T15:23:00.003-05:00

My days being on the forefront of cyber technology stopped in 1991 when I graduated from Carnegie Mellon University. At CMU, I was exposed to a thing that had been around since the 1970's, but when I attended CMU, usage was still primarily confined to governmental and academic environs and to text-only newsgroups (we called them "b-boards" at CMU). It was kind of cool to be able to communicate with people all over the world in this smallish community. Of course, since then the internet exploded into what has become a normal part of everyday existence for most everyone.

In the years since graduation, I have relied on twentysomethings--or friends who date twentysomethings--to keep me up on the latest technology. Sure, I knew that my cell phone could send and receive text messages, but it wasn't until I had two exchange students living with me last year that I became more versed, so to speak, in its usage. And I've since found it's a very useful tool--sort of an on-the-road email alternative.

I've only recently gotten a Facebook account (thank you, Katie), and to my surprise I've already racked up over 50 friends. Facebook, in case you aren't familiar with it, allows users to have a kind of mini-web site where they can post pictures, add a profile, and connect and talk to other users. While I don't think I'll ever be as enamoured as some of my friends about it, it's a nice way to reconnect with old friends and keep people in the loop as to what you are doing. My ambivalence about Facebook is probably a good thing, because I could easily see how this could become an addiction.

The newest cyber technology is Twitter. Twitter is something I had seen on my friend Andy's excellent Dark Ufo web site, a central depository for all things Lost, but never looked into it or thought too much about it. Then about a month ago, I was sitting in a marketing meeting, and the twenty-something marketing director started enthusing about Twitter. She must have said "it's so cool" about five times, so I thought if something got her that excited, there must be something to it. As if by serendipity, ever since then, it's been popping up in conversation and in the news.

Twitter is, in a nutshell, a way of transmitting, by text message, very short (140 characters max) messages to people who also have Twitter accounts. A recent newspaper article described these messages as "is the haiku of social networking". Apparently everyone who's everyone Twitters--from President Obama (although he hasn't "tweeted"--Twitter talk for posted a text--since the election) to celebrities to journalists.

I can see the attraction this type of communique would have to a journalist, as it's a concise way to receive news--from eyewitnesses who are tweeting in real time. Remember when the USAirways plane crash landed in the Hudson? A witness to the crash was one of the first people to break the news--via Twitter.

Twitter, like text messages, emails, Facebook, MySpace, and all the other cyber ways to communicate, definitely has its place. But will we all be tweeting soon with mundane messages to each other--just to say we're part of the Twitter Nation?

I think I will leave tweeting to birds for now.

Oscars 2009: Few Surprises, Still Very Moving

2009-02-23T16:41:00.006-05:00

Maybe it was because my cat has been sick with a yucky eye thing (which facilitated a trip to the animal ER earlier on Sunday), but I seemed especially caught up in the emotion of this year's Oscar ceremonies.

Hugh Jackman is an affable man, certainly talented in a singing/dancing/jazz hands kind of way. He brought a different kind of hosting talent to the awards show, a departure from the traditional comedian (Steve Martin, David Letterman, Whoopi Goldberg, et al). But I missed the gentle slings and arrows usually accompanying the opening monologue. While Jackman is the perfect choice for hosting the Tony Awards, I'd much rather see someone like Ricky Gervais tackle the Oscars next year. Gervais is irreverent, witty, and so undeniably British--which I think means he can get away with a bit more because us Americans are so enamored with all things English.

I missed the pre-award on E! and the TV Guide Channel due to a much-too-long nap and a call from the parents, but I did watch the ABC 30-minute pre-show. I didn't get to see everyone, of course, but ABC did a respectable job of corralling many of the main nominees.

Of the women, we saw some unusual colors for gowns. Winner Kate Winslet wore a gunmetal grey silk shantung that fit her exquisitely, but I was not in love with the one shoulder style with the netting overlay and the molded hair.

One person that rocked the one shoulder style was Marisa Tomei. She has, in the past, gotten flack for her choice of gowns. Her choice this time was a light pearl gray architectural beauty that I thought was appropriate for the event and elegant and fresh at the same time. Meryl Streep also selected a gray gown in a dove gray. It was age appropriate and it fit her figure in a very flattering way.

Taraji P. Henson (she's a sassy girl!) went for an ivory gown that looked too closely to a mummy in surgical gauze, but anyone who can wear horizontal layers and still look that great--well, I can't say too many negative things about it.

Winner Penelope Cruz's story to Tim Gunn pre-show was cute: she saw this dress eight years ago and knew she would want to wear it one day. When she received the nomination this year, she tracked down the dress. It was on the fussy side with lots with lacy overlays over chiffon, but the ivory color really complemented her coloring and her hair was really pretty.

Redhead Amy Adams chose a ruby red gown, taking what I thought was a fashion risk. While I thought that the chiffon attached to the gown's neckline looked like an errant napkin, I appreciate her adventureness.

Another nominee who went with a bold color choice was Viola Davis, who completely rocked a gold lame dress that worked perfectly with her very bubbly personality. Unfortunately, metallic did not work for Melissa Leo, who looked matronly in a 1980's hairdo and a copper colored dress that looked more like a trashy prom gown.

Angelina Jolie was, I believe, the only nominee to wear basic black, and it was a pretty, though not particularly outstanding, gown. Her emerald jewelry of dangle earrings and a HUGE ring was the best jewelry on the red carpet. But could she and Brad be more smirky and standoffish? They blew off interviewers on the red carpet and she did a smirk 'heard round the world when Jennifer Anniston came out to present. You may be beautiful, Angie, but didn't your mother teach you any manners?

My winner for the ladies nominated is...Anne Hathaway. Last year she wore a beautiful red ruffled gown, and this year as a nominee she went uber glam in an ivory strapless sheath covered with crystals--which were arranged slightly diagonally. You have to weigh about 80 pounds to look good in a dress like that--and Hathaway did it without looking like one of the Olsen twins.

As far as guys go, I thought all but one of the nominees looked really good and appropriate for the evening. Robert Downey, Jr. looked the best in a traditional tuxe, and he looked really neat and well coiffed and just looked really happy. Of course, Mickey Rourke, whom I love as an actor, still has not found the shampoo bottle at his house, and looked not good in a cream colored suit with a black vest. His necklace he fashioned with a picture of his beloved Loki, who died less than a week before the awards, was very touching, though.

As far as the show went, I thought the idea of having past award winners (one for each of the nominees for each category) was a master stroke of genius. Besides having the winner from the year before, other award winners included Shirley MacLaine, Sophia Loren, Joel Grey, Christopher Walken, and Michael Douglas. Each former winner spoke directly to one of the nominees, many of whom were visably moved and in tears. I thought it was a great way to pay homage to the nominees, as well as highlight former winners. I hope they make this a tradition in future ceremonies.

In the major categories, there weren't any surprises amongst the acting categories. Heath Ledger won for best supporting actor, and his parents and sister were there to accept the award, and spoke very eloquently about the man they knew as their son and brother. Sean Penn gave a funny speech, calling the Academy "commie, homo-loving", and included in his speech a shout-out to his fellow nominee and long-time friend, Mickey Rourke.

The only big surprise of the night was that "Waltzing with Brashir" did not win best Foreign Film, which was won by the Japanese film "Departures". But "Man on Wire" did, with wire walker Philippe Petit doing something probably never done with an Oscar: he balanced the top of Oscar on his upper lip.

While the show was almost 25 minutes over, I appreciated the fact that none of the winners got cut off and got to take their time in their acceptance speech. After all, for some people, this may be a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity and I say if they want to take a minute or two to thank people, let them.

It's a Good Day When Poor People Can Eat...And Procreate!

2009-02-20T15:12:00.006-05:00

If you saw my post from yesterday, I was summoned to my phone yesterday for an interview with my caseworker regarding possible extension of my food stamp benefits, only to find that she was on medical leave.

Today I got a notice in the mail from medical-leave-caseworker notifying me that my food stamp benefits have been extended through August of this year! Whoo-hoo! Little Debbie snack cakes for everyone!

My happy mood swelled when I opened my next piece of mail, from Highmark. I am on a special (i.e., for poor people) health insurance plan with Highmark that's actually pretty good, and only $35 a month. While I've not had many instances to use it, it's good to know that it's there--just in case I do need it.

The letter from Highmark brought with it good news for anyone who wants to procreate in a safe, pregnancy-proof kind of way: "contraceptive services" that were previously excluded are now covered, including "prescription drugs, contraceptive devices, implants and injections, and all related services". Whoo-hoo! Norplants for everyone!

I applaud Highmark for making what I think is a very wise decision. Even thinking about this in simple economics (which I'm sure was the main motivator for Highmark) that providing birth control is cheaper than the possible alternatives: terminating unwanted pregnancies or paying for the care of an expectant mother and the birth of her child. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to be getting over to the Rite-Aid...

Rodney and Me

2009-02-19T13:45:00.004-05:00

I'm not ashamed to admit that I am one of the increasing number of Americans that is relying on the government for assistance. This winter season I received LIHEAP to help pay for my heating bill (it covered one month's worth) and beginning in the fall, I've received food stamps and cash assistance to help with my job search (money went towards paying another month's worth of heat).

For those of you who have not applied for welfare benefits, it can be an onorous and time-consuming process. There is a lot of paperwork to fill out, then subsequent visits and phone calls from the Department of Welfare, and then even more paperwork to fill out. There's no getting around it: if you want the benefits, you've got to grit your teeth and fill out whatever form or provide whatever information the Welfare Department asks you to provide, go to their office when they tell you, and answer the phone when they call you.

But I'd have to say my patience officially reached its limit this morning. Last month, I received a renewal notice, with a page-long request of items to submit to them. This renewal notice also notified me of an upcoming telephone interview to take place this morning. I dutifully filled out the forms provided, submitted the over 20 pages of financial documentation, and waited by the phone this morning for the obligatory post-paperwork interview.

Well, the designated hour came and went, and no call from my caseworker. I waited nearly an hour, then called my caseworker. What did I learn? She's on medical leave this month, so don't leave her a message! Instead, I was directed to her supervisor. Oh, I thought to myself, I'll call her supervisor alright. I had a harranguing all planned in my head.

But--the Department of Welfare got the last laugh when I called the supervisor--and her voice mail was full. Can't leave a message! Now you would think that since this phone interview didn't take place due to the fault of the Department of Welfare, that the onus is on them to make sure it gets re-scheduled. Ha! If someone else wants to risk losing benefits in these circumstances, I say go right ahead.

I am not saying I am unappreciative of the government helping me. But what I am saying is that just because I am not working doesn't mean my time is not valuable. Don't give me marching orders to be poised by my phone at the appointed day and time to not bother to call me, or to even tell me the call is not going to come. That's just bad manners, and like my friend Rodney says, it shows no respect.

Rihanna Disappearing

2009-02-18T13:58:00.004-05:00

Unless you've been in a cave for the last few days, you've already heard about the smackdown between hip-hop artist Chris Brown and pop singer Rihanna Sunday night right before the Grammy's. Last week I wrote about how, IMHO, there was much ado about fact that Michael Phelps smoked pot and his losing at least one endorsement deal.

You may not agree with me about Phelps, but I can't think of a legitimate reason that would cause a man to punch and hit a woman to the point that her lip split and her face became bruised. While Brown is 19 and Rihanna is 20, 19 is old enough to know better--to have enough respect for a woman even in the heat of an argument not to use your fists to prove your point.

If there is anyone who needs to lose endorsement deals, it's Brown. Not surprisingly, once Brown was arrested and the details were leaked to the press, Brown retained a high-powered PR firm (who, according to press reports, specialize in "crisis management") and issued a statement that read in part, " am seeking the counseling of my pastor, my mother and other loved ones and I am committed, with God's help, to emerging a better person."

I hope that this is not just lip service (pardon the pun) but that this experience sobers up Brown and he does indeed learn from this experience and gets any help that he needs regarding anger management.

In what has to be a moment of utter stupidity, even for him, Kanye West was one of several stars who have publicly defended Brown. At a VH1 program taping, West, after being asked about the incident said, "Can't we give Chris a break?". Um, no, and I bet you'd be singing (or should I say rapping) a different tune if your beloved late mother was beaten up by some guy.

I think the only one in this circus who has shown any amount of class is Rihanna. She has not been seen publicly since the incident and has issued no statements. Ironically, her latest single is called "Rehab", which is a place Chris Brown may very well end up.

You've Heard of War Profiteers--But How About Poor-fiteers?

2009-02-17T12:03:00.007-05:00

Last Fall, my sister told me about an organization that distributes food to those who need it, Angel Food Ministries (AFM). It operates similarly to that of a food pantry in that groceries are distributed once a month at neighborhood distribution centers. However, unlike a food pantry, anyone who wants to receive food from AFM must pay $30 for the food.

While both my sister and her husband have jobs, they went to AFM to help make ends meet. Amy explained that at her pick-up location (in a bedroom community outside of Washington, DC), all kinds of people got food from AFM--"not just poor people," she said. "I've seen people pull up in Lexuses to pick up their food."

Since my sister recommended it, I decided to give it a try. AFM's website declares that its monthly food distribution will feed a family of four for a week, with the $30 you pay is the equivalent of $115 in "grocery store" food.

Distribution day came and for $30, this is what I got: 1 pound package of frozen mixed vegetables, 1 box of cookies, 1 dozen eggs, 1 package pre-seasoned chicken breasts, 1 package chicken breasts, 1 package of 4 steaks, a meatloaf, 1 pound spaghetti, 1 can pasta sauce, six tortillas, 1 box mac & cheese, 1 can refried beans, 1 quart milk, and 1 pack hot dogs.

While this the quantity of food is decent, there is no way this would feed a family of four for a week. It might provide seven dinners, if one goes heavy on the meat. Particularly disturbing is the lack of key ingredients for a balanced and healthful diet: fruits (completely absent), vegetables (1 pound for the entire week), cereals/grains (none) and dairy (1 quart).

Then there was the quality of the food itself. I am not a picky eater, but the quality was so poor that most of the food was not fit to eat. The spaghetti, pasta sauce, and cookies, for example, were of poorer quality to that of store brands, similar to what you'd see at the local dollar store. And the meat was of questionable freshness and origin: the steaks and chicken packs were pumped full of nitrates and preservatives. The hot dogs were slimy and smelled "off".

Of my $30 grocery pack, I was able to use the eggs, milk, cookies, and frozen vegetables, which I estimate to be valued at about $5 or $6. The rest got thrown away. Not exactly the deal I was looking for. Email requests for a refund have been unacknowledged and unanswered by AFM.

My experience with AFM got me curious about the organization, which promotes itself as a faith-based organization started by Joe and Linda Wingo, and decided to pull their 990 income tax return.

I will say this about AFM: they are not lying when they say they have a large organization. AFM sold over $111 million dollars worth of food. After backing out their expenses to buy and distribute this food (and with the help of government grants totalling nearly $1 million and other donated "materials" of $11 million), AFM was left with a tidy profit of nearly $27 million.

But it was where this profit went that interested me. The Wingo family has, not to put too fine a point on it, done very well financially in this endeavor. While non-family staff receive market-appropriate salaries ranging from $25-80,000, the salaries of the Wingo parents and their two children add up to a staggering $2.5 million plus.

I am not saying that people who work hard should be compensated. And I'm not saying that if you work in nonprofit you should take a vow of poverty. But it seems to me to be a tad bit obscene if you make millions of dollars each year off the backs on America's working poor, delivering poor-quality products with a value significantly less than represented. There's something a bit obscene to me to be heading a "Christian charity" and making millions of dollars in the process. And where's the charity in that?

From the Same Country that Brought You IKEA...

2009-02-11T00:12:00.003-05:00

Well, initially the blog post was going to be about the woman who just gave birth to octoplets (and who looks a bit like that other mom of many kids, Angelina Jolie), but my head is still spinning from the last post and comments as well as nearly coughing up a lung in the last three days. I have, boys and girls, a bad case of the flu. So bad that I've lost my voice--well, almost. I still have my blog!

So before I smear Vicks all over me and head off to bed, I thought I'd share this story: about a very cool treehouse designed by Swedish architects Tham and Videgard Hansson. I see this as being similiar to one of those concept cars the big auto manufacturers roll out every year: to use as a jumping off point to build a (hopefully) smarter, more efficient vehicle. Clearly you can't have a dwelling (or hotel room/suite) without a bathroom, or a ladder to enter the building. But the design of a mirrored cube suspended from a tree so as to better integrate into the surrounds--genius, I say. It's a 21st century version of the aesthetic Frank Lloyd Wright practiced with his iconic structure Fallingwater.

Part of the reason why I love Pittsburgh, as my friend Rich recently reminded me, is the embarrassment of riches we have here with regard to architecture. I love old buildings--from the gleaming wood newel posts, to the Italian tiled fireplaces, to the embossed tin on the ceilings. But there is something to be said of new architecture, too--of the clean lines and economy of space.

Now I'm not going to be calling the Hanssons to order one of their treehouses, but it does have me looking at modern architecture differently. And with that, I'm going to cough up my remaining lung...

Now Hiring: Spokesperson (Must be Squeaky Clean)

2009-02-07T19:56:00.009-05:00

This afternoon I went to my local coffeehouse for a round of Scrabble with Nut Bar (which I lost by the way, despite playing two bingos), and post-game I was all caffeine-buzzed and looking for something substantial to absorb all of the coffee in my stomach. Then I remembered the Subway right across the street.

And what's more substantial than a Subway? I tell ya, those Subway folks were geniuses when they revamped their menu with the $5 footlongs (Sing along in your head with me: Five. Five. Five Dollar Foot Longs!). I saddled up to the counter, ordered my Black Forest Ham/Turkey Breast with the works and hiked up 44th Street.

So I get home and what do I discover--buzz on the Internet of the impending dumping of Phelps from his recent endorsement deal from Subway. As featured on gawker.com, Phelps' name and image was listed on Subway's web site (as a "Fresh Celebrity", whatever that means), but now if you go to Subway's site, you'll see that only Ryan Howard and Reggie Bush (along with Subway's own Jared) are listed as celebrities. Curiously enough, this site does encourage you to "spread the buzz"--apparently as long as that buzz doesn't involve a doobie.

So I'm now retracting what I just said about Subway and declaring them idiots. Really, talk about much ado about nothing. Has the world forgotten how old (or maybe I should say how young) Michael Phelps is? He's 23, at an age where if he wasn't swimming and collecting gold medals, he'd be doing bongs in the basement of his fraternity house just like every other red-blooded, American guy.

I'll go on the record to tell you I don't smoke pot. Never did. But--America, I hate to break it to you, I'm the exception to this rule, and here's a news flash: most college-aged kids smoke dope. And--double yoi--many people continue to do so past their twenties. They don't go from being pot smokers to mainlining heroin: they hold down jobs, are good parents, and lead normal, respectable lives.

But what Phelps is going to have to do what Kate Moss did, who lost her endorsement deals when a picture of her snorting coke appeared in the tabloids. She publicly apologized and went to rehab. Then, quietly, many of the companies that endorsed her (H&M, Burberry, etc.) picked up her contract again.

Was Kate Moss addicted to coke? Maybe, maybe not. Is Phelps a drug addict? I seriously doubt it. However, like Moss, the only road to redemption I see for Phelps is a public apology and a stint in rehab. Might I recommend Passages in Malibu? It's set above the crashing waves of the Pacific, and in between therapy sessions, you can enjoy all sorts of amenities, including gourmet food. And I bet that menu doesn't feature a single $5 foot long.

Maybe Not Such a Bright Idea

2009-02-04T11:34:00.008-05:00

So this morning I was perusing the latest issue of Pop City, the terrific e-magazine about all things Pittsburgh. This issue focused on going green, a subject near and dear to my heart.

I eagerly opened up the story entitled Pittsburgh Home to First Solar-Powered Trolley Line in the World. What an interesting idea, I thought, a trolley line to run on electricity generated by the sun. But as it turns out, it might not be such a bright idea after all.

At first blush, the idea holds promise: The Pennsylvania Trolley Museum has, as part of its attractions, antique trolley cars for visitors to enjoy what the article calls "a scenic, four-mile ride." The Museum estimates that it will save an estimated $5,000 in electricity costs in its first year of operation, in 2010.

I'm all for using alternative energy, especially from sources that don't require digging up or drilling to mine that energy. And while I was a bit skeptical that here in dreary Southwestern Pennsylvania there's actually enough sun to electrify something bigger than a coffee pot, I wanted to learn more.

Then I discovered the catch. The price tag for this "energy-saving system" is a mind-boggling...$271,391. So while it may claim to be energy saving, it certainly is not money-saving, since it will take about 55 years to pay for it. And that's assuming that no additional money, like maintenance and upkeep, will need to be poured into it over those 55 years. And that's also assuming that there is indeed sufficient sunlight to generate said electricity, which you still have to convince me of.

But here's the kicker: guess who is paying for this solar system? You've guessed it: me, you, and every other taxpayer in this fine state, thanks to a grant from the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania. It's from a program called the "Energy Harvest Program" from the Department of Environmental Protection.

So congratulations, DEP, for paying for this latest boondoggle: a solar system that will take over five decades to pay for, to drive nostalgia-seeking septuagenarians and their grandkiddies to ride on a trolley--to nowhere!

In the article, Trolley Museum Executive Director Scott Becker states that he shared the idea with the Port Authority and PAT is considering the idea for its light rail system. Now there's a novel idea: giving the money to someone who actually takes passengers somewhere. Not that the Port Authority could actually be trusted with the money, either (in their hands, the cost would probably balloon to a half mill), but at least if you give them the money, it might actually benefit the public at large.

Mad as I am? What to vent to someone? Well, you can: you can give Kerry Campell over at the DEP a piece of your mind: all of her contact information is here. And you can tell ole Kerry that your buddy Julie sent you.

Re: Taxes--Two Simple Words to Help Ya

2009-02-03T19:37:00.005-05:00

What is it with potential cabinet appointees and their taxes? I may not like it very much but I pay my taxes every year. Even the year I sold my house in DC and had to pay capital gains tax on the ginormous amount I made on the sale. It was painful, but guess what, I did it.

The latest is Tom Daschele, who was the nominee for Secretary of Health and Human Services. Apparently he used a car and did not declare the use of the car on his income taxes. It must have been one hell of a car, because all told, he had to pay the IRS over $128,000 in back taxes. Reporter Andrea Mitchell, when interviewing Senator Daschele, reported that Daschele became "emotional" and "was near tears." I say, cry me a river, Buddy!

Earlier, Nancy Killefer, nominated by Obama to be the government's first Chief Performance Officer, said she didn't want her "bungling" of payroll taxes on her household help to be a distraction. Really, what is it with taxing the nanny, et al? Certainly people realize that when you hire someone--whether to work in your home or outside of it--you have to pay taxes?

I am far from a tax expert, but it sounds to me like these are fairly simple tax issues. Are these people trying to save a few dollars by doing their taxes themselves? If so, I have two words for them: Jackson Hewitt.

The whole thing reminds me of the old Steve Martin routine about how to become a millionaire (or in this case a political appointee). He has a different set of two words that might have helped Daschele and Killefer, part of his 1977 monologue on SNL:

You can be a millionaire and never pay taxes! You can be a millionaire and never pay taxes! You say,"Steve.. how can I be a millionaire.. and never pay taxes?" First.. get a million dollars. Now.. you say, "Steve.. what do I say to the tax man when he comes to my door and says, 'You have never paid taxes'?" Two simple words. Two simple words in the English language: "I forgot!"

How many times do we let ourselves get into terrible situations because we don't say "I forgot"? Let's say you're on trial for armed robbery. You say to the judge, "I forgot armed robbery was illegal."

I live in a Steeler Nation...

2009-02-02T17:26:00.002-05:00

Well, as you might imagine, everyone in Pittsburgh seems to be whooping it up because of last night's Super Bowl victory. I just heard on the news that rush hour traffic this morning and tonight was very light, with people saying that many people took today off due to "too much celebrating" the night before. You've just got to love Pittsburgh and its Steelers fans.

I didn't watch the whole game, and I am no football expert by any stretch of the imagination, but it looked to my untrained eye that they came very close to blowing it. Of course a win is a win, and they were able to pull it together and get a touchdown in the 11th hour. So I raise my cup of decaf to ya!

On a less celebratory note, I got my two gas bills today (big house, two furnaces, what can I say?) and not surprisingly they were high. Very high. So I called my best friend Heather over at Manpower to see if I can plead for some work.

Heather had a possible job, and put in my resume for it. I'll find out tomorrow if I got it. Unfortunately, even though the job is less than 4 miles from my house, by bus it will take two buses and over an hour to get there (it's in a very inaccessible part of East Liberty/Lincoln-Lemington). These are the times when I pine for DC bus and subway service, but a job's a job and I've got this ginormous house to support!

Stay warm everyone and bask in the post-Super Bowl glory...

Winter--I Think I Like the Song Better

2009-01-31T17:13:00.006-05:00

Don't know what the weather has been like where you live, but it's been miserable here (see pic of my side courtyard). I have to admit, here in Pittsburgh we've been spoiled the last couple of years with mild winters. But I just heard on the news last night that we've had the eighth snowiest winter on record--whoo-hoo, let's pop open that bottle of Dom!

I had lunch with my friend Jen yesterday, and we were commiserating about the cold and she also thinks about moving out of Pittsburgh. Of course my first choice would be Barbados, where cold weather there is about 50 degrees, but unless I've forgotten about some money buried in my backyard, or a winning lottery ticket I possess, that won't be happening any time soon.

So the more practical solution is DC, where you've got one month in the summer of horribly hot weather, but the winters are way milder. And, as Obama has already found out, when there is any snow to speak of, the place just shuts down. Snow days--it's like being in fourth grade again! So I have about 10 months to figure out how to either sell or rent this house and move somewhere else, either buy a house in Pittsburgh or move elsewhere. It will all depend on where I end up getting a job.

Speaking of jobs, my interview this week went well. It was conducted by a CPA, so it was unsurprisingly short and to the point. The next round is actually the final round, which will be in-person interviews. So I like the process so far, unlike many other places which favor the 4-5+ interviews.

Unfortunately, I did discover that Rebuilding Together Pittsburgh's offices are not where I had thought. I thought they were on Parkway Center Drive (a/k/a Foster Plaza in Green Tree) but it's actually Parkway View, which is RIDC Park West--waaaaaay out in the middle of nowhere. There is bus service there, but door to door it would be at least 90 minutes each way (factoring in the travel by foot to get to the stops and transferring from one bus to another). Right now I can't be too picky about location and I figure: why get all stressed out about something that hasn't happened yet?

The good news is that RIDC Park is HUGE, so I could very well find someone to carpool with. So I'm not ruling it out, and I'm continuing to look other places, too. We'll let the Interview Gods decide my fate!

Only 331 Days 'Til Christmas!

2009-01-28T13:02:00.005-05:00

Yes, I am officially one of those people that you hate, because last night with a single phone call, I did almost all of my Christmas shopping.

What would provoke me to do such a thing? A sale, naturally! For a while I bought a lot from the Eddie Bauer Outlet--I'd get the email from them about the take an additional 30% off the clearance price--and I'd be there faster than you can say, well, just about anything. My Dad and brother-in-law especially benefited from it, and my Mom liked the shirts I'd get that "you don't have to iron--just jerk them out of the dryer, and they're ready to go" (her words, not mine).

But lately it seemed that even if I got to the website right away, pickings would be slim. So last year I changed tacks a bit and ordered from the Metropolitan Museum of Art catalogue. It sounds like a super fancy place to buy Christmas gifts, but they actually have a nice collection of things, exempting the expensive costume jewelry and their bizarre predilection towards women's scarves and throws (who wears those any more, anyway?). The note cards and stationery are particularly lovely.

I can't tell you what I got (since family members read my blog), but suffice to say, nearly everything was half off. Online you can save even more by taking an additional 20% off (I got a free tote bag instead when I ordered by phone). Those who have known me know how incredibly cheap I am so when I say they're offering good sales, they're offering good sales!

While I'm on the subject of online shopping, here's a great website to check out. It's called Ebates, and once you register (it's free and easy to do), you get cash back from literally hundreds of stores online. So before you order something from Amazon.com, for instance, go to Ebates.com, log in, and navigate to Amazon through Ebates. Your cash back goes into your Ebates account, and once you reach the minimum (I think it's $5 or $10), you request the money and they cut you a check.

I thought it all sounded a little fishy, but it was featured in a special issue of Consumer Reports where Ebates was mentioned as one of the seven web sites that could save you thousands. Saving thousands could be a stretch, but if you combine using Ebates with paying with the Discover Card (which also offers a cash back bonus) you could end up easily saving 10-20%.

So get shopping, because they're only 331 days until Santa Time!

The Moment You Wake Up, Before You Put On Your Make-Up

2009-01-27T17:25:00.005-05:00

Yes, after months of sending out resumes, submitting applications, and biting my fingernails down to the quick, it's happened: I have a job interview.

It's with Rebuilding Pittsburgh, part of the national Rebuilding franchise. Working with tradespeople, volunteers help repair and renovate the homes of needy elderly people throughout Allegheny County. As you might imagine, the demand for this kind of service is huge. I saw on their website that for their "Rebuilding Together" day last April, over 300 households applied for help and only 30 were accepted.

The job is for their Executive Director, and honestly I think the only reason I was able to get a first interview is because PSVN provided volunteers for two "Rebuilding Together" days, and through this work I had a cordial, telephonic relationship with their ED. Since the aforementioned ED is helping with the search for her replacement, she may have helped nudge my application closer to the top of the pile.

But, really, who cares? I don't! I'd just about make a deal with the devil to get a job that a) I like and whose mission I can support; b) has decent benefits/salary; c) the people are reasonably sane and nice to work with.

To make sure I don't have to contact Lucifer and sell my soul for the sake of viable employment, just say a little prayer for me (you can thank me later for having that song stick in your mind all day!).

I'll let you know how it goes in a future post. In the meantime, keep your fingers crossed!

Two Surprises Re: Taxes

2009-01-26T18:26:00.002-05:00

I got my real estate taxes in the mail the other day, and as I'm opening up the envelope, I'm wondering how exactly I'm going to pay for them. Pittsburgh has notoriously high real estate taxes (I pay roughly the same as I did for my house in DC--which was assessed at a value four times higher than my house in Pittsburgh).

Anyway, I open up the bill and I find that my taxes have actually gone down. Yeah, I couldn't believe it, either: down, as in about 25% less. Upon closer inspection of the bill, it appears that the City of Pittsburgh (and School District) is joining Allegheny County in utilizing the homestead exemption act. So all told I'll be saving hundreds of dollars that I don't have. Whoo-hoo!

My second surprise came in the form of my federal income taxes. I had seen on the IRS' tax site that many companies are offering free e-filing if you meet certain income qualifications. After trying one site (too many whirly-twirly things made it too slow on my dial-up connection), I gave Free Tax USA a try.

They were, in a word, GREAT! It's super easy, and I felt like I was starring in one of those Turbo Tax ads where the guy gushes, "Turbo Tax found deductions I didn't even know existed and got me hundreds more!" Well, Free Tax USA did the same thing for me, and I didn't even have to buy fancy Turbo Tax software. The coolest thing is the window in the upper right corner--as you progress in your tax preparation, it shows your refund due: and the number keeps increasing (at least in my case).

Free Tax USA got me every penny back that I paid on Federal Taxes, plus essentially doubled my refund when they calculated an Earned Income Credit. They also prepared my PA Tax Return and it turns out I'll get a refund there, too. Both refunds will pay for about two-thirds of my real estate taxes this year.

I really recommend e-filing, especially if you take take advantage of free e-filing. Now if they could only help me with my job search......

PA Bill RE: Cell Phone Use While Driving

2009-01-25T21:17:00.004-05:00

Honestly I cannot believe that we continue to debate banning (or limiting) cell phone use while driving. A well-known study by the University of Utah concluded that people who talk on the phone--even while using hands-free headsets--are just as impaired as people driving while drunk (you can read more about this study here).

The data is staggeringly against drivers talking on cell phones: countless studies have proved that cell phone users drive slower, cause gridlock and are twice as likely to cause rear end collisions. According to a study by the Human Factors and Ergonomics Society, cell phone distraction causes 2,600 deaths and 330,000 injuries in the United States every year.

So why exactly are we still arguing about this? While I favor a complete ban of cell phone use while driving, requiring cell phone use be limited to hands-free would at least be a step in the right direction. And I have yet to hear an argument advocating cell phone use while driving that makes any sense when weighed against the evidence of it causing such a dangerous environment.

Ten years ago few people had cell phones and we all got along just fine without be plugged in 24/7 to our phones. I will grant you that cell phones provide convenience in a busy life: being able to call someone en route when running late or needing directions, for example. And let's be clear: there's nothing stopping anyone from still having your cell phone in your car--just pull off the road and yak to your heart's content, you can still have your cell phone with you in an emergency, etc.

I applaud the state legislators that have authored/sponsored bills limiting the use of cell phones while driving, especially Senator Conti from Bucks County, who's been trying to pass legislation since 1999. If you feel as strongly as I do that legislation needs to be passed limiting cell phone use, contact your local State Representative and Senator. My fear is that if a bill isn't passed and enforced once it becomes the law, accidents and fatalities will increase exponentially. And do we really have to wait until some Hollywood starlet--or your sister, or daughter, or mother, for that matter-- gets killed by a cell phone using driver when legislation is on deck to help prevent tragedies now?

BHO is my new BFF!

2009-01-23T19:42:00.005-05:00

It's still sinking in that we have a new president. The campaign went on so long that I got caught up in the process of electing a democrat (I first supported Richardson, then Obama) that I'd forgotten what that outcome actually means. I see Obama on TV and it's slowly sinking in that he's president now. I was talking about the gestation time between new episodes of Lost being so long, but it pales in comparison to this last presidential election cycle--it was, what, more than two years?

I keep seeing the little news blurbs on Yahoo! re: Obama and think, "boy, he's not wasting any time." Then my alter ego/evil twin says, "No, Stupidhead--he's had more than two bloody years to figure out what he was going to do as President!"

I know this is clearly the honeymoon period; I mean, the man has been president only a few days. But he's getting right down to it, isn't he? Today he signed an Executive Order that overturned the ban of giving federal money to international groups that perform abortions or provide abortion information. This will no doubt be controversial with some people, but it shows me that he's not going to shy away from these kind of controversial issues.

Of course, he's got to work on the E (Economy), but what would you like to see Obama do? These days, I'm all about another E: the environment. My ideas include:

bumping up (or initiating) tax credits or zero percent interest loans on people installing solar panels, wind turbines, solar-heated water tanks, or other clean energy appliance, or buying energy star appliances, such as an energy star refrigerator.
providing tax credits and/or zero percent financing on people buying hybrid, all electric, or natural-gas fueled vehicles (new or used!).
Increasing the luxury tax for those who continue to buy cars that don't meet a minimum MPG.
providing tax credits for those people who car pool or take public transporation to work (don't know how you can prove this, but BHO is a smart guy and he can figure it out!).

Of course, there can also be similiar incentives for businesses. And while I don't personally support a bailout of the auto industry, I am pragmatic enough to realize that they're going to get the loans they need.

But - let's put some tough conditions on the money, like producing more fuel efficient cars and not allowing their CEO's to spend over a million dollars redecorating their office, like the former CEO at Merrill Lynch (you can see why they needed that bailout). Even local "nonprofit" UPMC has the presence of mind to spend a more appropriate $65,000 or so for CEO Jeffrey Romoff's new office (although the new signs on USX Tower cost $750,000). I think other companies can show similar restraint...

Oscar Nominations!

2009-01-22T17:24:00.006-05:00

I just checked out the Oscar Nominations for this year and I realize that I have a lot of movie watching to do! I either didn't see a lot of movies this year, or a lot of crappy movies this year. Either way, I think the only nominated movie I saw was The Dark Knight, and I was underwhelmed with it.

I was glad to see Richard Jenkins nominated for The Visitor. He is a great character actor, and while I have not seen the movie, he is a consistently good actor. I was disappointed that Tell No One was not nominated for Best Foreign Language Film. It's probably on DVD and I highly recommend it. It has one of the best foot chases I've ever seen--and it's not even a James Bond movie!

I'm not surprised that Heath Ledger got nominated. He was a talented actor--I thought he was extraordinary in Monster's Ball, for instance. But I just don't think this role--or the movie for that matter--was Oscar worthy. I will admit that the comic book action genre is not my bag, but Iron Man was waaay better than Dark Knight. Hey, my opinion and a couple of bucks will get you a Coolata at Dunkin' Donuts.

I may have a get-together Oscar night--in the meantime, I've got a whole lot of watching to do!

[Julie] in Chains, New Baby Born Today!

2009-01-21T14:44:00.010-05:00

How Do You Like Them Apples?

I was at Home Depot the other day, getting new filters for my furnaces, when I thought about big box stores. My hometown of Warren, Pennsylvania, did not have any national chains when I was growing up. But that changed when Pizza Hut came in 1978. It opened to such fanfare that the first month it was open, our little town of 10,000 managed to outeat every other Pizza Hut chain in the entire country. In the years following, Warren generally steered clear of restaurant chains and big box retailers. So while residents may have all been feasting on Pizza Hut, we'd still buy clothes at Levinson Brothers, groceries at Quality Market, and furnace filters over at the Lawn & Garden Center.

Levinson's and Quality have long since closed, but the Lawn & Garden Center is still open. While my parents like supporting local businesses, it's tempered with pragmatism: "We're retired and have to watch every penny," my Mom declared. A few years ago a new shopping complex opened, anchored by Aldi's and a Super Wal-Mart. My Mom quickly discovered that shopping at these two stores reduced her grocery bill by about 30 percent, and it's hard to argue with that kind of savings.

A Pittsburgh-based business has made it easier to buy local, a nonprofit called Good Apples (you can read more about them here). The upfront cost will likely be higher than buying at a grocery store, but since it's fresher (with a longer shelf life and less waste), it will probably end up being about the same. This is the perfect time for Good Apples to open, since Farmers Markets don't operate in the winter. So instead of going to the Strip for fresh, local produce (ugh), they deliver it to you. And any way to put more money in local pockets can't be a bad thing.

A Delivery (Nearly) Nine Months in the Making

I am, of course, talking about (drum roll, please) Lost. The new season is starting tonight, and with the last new episode airing in May, 2008, the gestation period has almost been as long as a human pregnancy.

Why am I so addicted to Lost, you might ask. The simple answer is the story: the writing is sharp and smart, the characters are well drawn, and the myriad details--from the complex back stories of all the characters, the set design (the story takes place in real time on an island, but flashbacks and flashforwards take place all over the world)--simply boggle my mind. It's written and designed much like a movie, and you know it's done its job when you forget they shoot the whole thing in Hawaii. The story (and set) transports you to such disparate places, including Iraq, Australia, Korea, and Berlin.

While some people like me, REALLY get into the show and appreciate all of the subtle nuance and influences, you can also watch it just as an interesting and entertaining show and not think about how the Swan Hatch was really a kind of Skinner Test (see what I mean?).

So what is Lost all about? Here's a truncated version of what's gone on for the last four seasons. Lost is the story of a group of survivors whose plane has crashed on an island in the South Pacific. Two strong leaders emerge: Jack, a doctor who deals in fact and doesn't believe in fate, and Locke, a man on a lifelong mission to find his place in the world, who believes it is destiny that brought everyone to the island. All of the survivors are flawed people, and have unresolved issues with their parents, especially their fathers. Even the seemingly nice and normal people have dark secrets.

Soon after the crash, the survivors soon discover two things about the island. First, the island is inhabited. Second, that the island has strange properties and has a spooky and dangerous entity they nickname "Smokey".

The survivors eventually learn that people have lived there for presumably hundreds of years, not unlike the ancient Mayans. The Survivors also learn that about 30 years ago, a group of scientists came to the island and built many structures, including homes and an intricate series of buildings (called hatches or stations) to be used for specific experiments, taking advantage of what they call "the unique qualities of the island." These experiments included studying electromagnetism and even the possibility of time travel. This group was called the DHARMA Initiative.

While the original island inhabitants had a seeming harmony with the island and "Smokey", the DHARMA Initiative claimed the island for their own purposes, and referred to the original inhabitants as "Hostiles". A boy raised in the DHARMA Initiative named Ben befriends the leader of the Hostiles, whose name is Richard. Ten to 15 years after this initial meeting, Ben leads a plot to kill all of the DHARMA scientists, including his own father. After the DHARMA people are killed, Ben becomes the leader of the group the Survivors call "the Others."

The Survivors meet a man named Desmond, whose sailboat crashed on the island about 4 years ago. He was rescued by a man named Inman (presumably a DHARMA person who survived the earlier purge) who works at one of the DHARMA stations. When Inman dies, Desmond continues to work at this DHARMA station. About a month after the Survivors crash, they discover this station, and Desmond. Along the way, the Survivors find also Ben, capture him, and imprison him in the station.

As the Survivors learn more about this Station, they debate amongst themselves whether the work of the Station (entering a numeric code into the computer at regular intervals) has a real purpose, or if it's just some psychological experiment. Opinions are divided and eventually they stop entering the number--and the station implodes. No one is killed, but the release of pent-up electromagnetism allows the world, for a split second, to reveal the island's location.

One person who is looking for the island is named Penelope, or Penny. She is Desmond's girlfriend, and the daughter of a wealthy industrialist, Charles Widmore. Penny is convinced Desmond is missing, not dead, and launches an effort to find him. When the location of the island is revealed (it's assumed Desmond's boat had some tracking beacon), it put her one step closer to finding him.

The actual mission of the Others is unclear, but it is clear that they are serious stewards of the island and don't want the Survivors or anyone else compromising their work, whatever that work is. While some people's health improves while living on the island (a paralyzed man can walk again, a woman's cancer goes into remission), the Others are not so lucky. About 4-5 years before the plane crash, pregnant women are dying before giving birth, and the Others are facing their own self-extinction. A fertility doctor from outside the island is brought to the island to help figure out the reasons for this phenomenon. The doctor's name is Juliet.

Just as there is dissention amongst the Survivors regarding the purpose of that DHARMA station, there are fractures showing amongst the Others. Eventually Juliet leaves the Others and lives with the Survivors.

Of course, the Survivors' main mission is to get off the island. Two groups of people arrive on the island and their purpose is revealed: to study the island and also to capture Ben, the leader of the Others. They are under the employ of Charles Widmore (coincidentally? the father of Desmond's Penelope) and they'll capture Ben at any cost. These people are called the "Freighter People" because they have a freighter about 20 miles from the island.

However, some of these Freighter People are sympathetic to the Survivors situation. With their help, they start ferrying Survivors from the island by zodiac boat to the Freighter. The Freighter also has a helicopter--Desmond and six of the Survivors are on that helicopter when they witness the Freighter exploding--and the island disappearing. Everyone who was ferried over to the Freighter is presumed dead. The Survivors who were still on the island are still alive.

The helicopter is ditched in the water and all survive and are on a liferaft from the helicopter. They are picked up by a boat, helmed by Penelope.

On the boat, they concoct a scheme to fit the story the public at large has given about the plane crash. Desmond and the helicopter pilot stay on Penny's boat, and the Six Survivors (called Oceanic Six), on the same liferaft, travel to an inhabited island. Once rescued, the Oceanic Six make no mention of their experience on the island, and they point to a different island as the one where they crashed. Even one of the Survivors, Kate, claims a baby who survived as her own, even if she's not the mother.

Ben also gets off the island and is actually responsible for the island disappearing. With Ben leaving the island, Locke takes his place as the leader of the Others. It seems that Richard has been following Locke from the time he was born. Locke finally has found his place in the world.

But has he? In the last season through a flashforward three years after the Oceanic Six get off the island, we learn that Locke has died, that bad things have happened to the Survivors left on the island, and that Jack has to convince all of the Oceanic Six Survivors that they need to return to the island--with Ben as their guide.

Whew! I skipped over a lot, but didn't want this to be a million pages long. Tonight there will be a similar recap at 8:00 p.m. of what's happened from the time of the crash to where the last episode left off. It's worth an hour of your time to check it out. Then the season premiere is at 9:00 p.m. Enjoy--I know I will!

Inauguration Day!

2009-01-21T00:56:00.019-05:00

Inauguration day has come and gone, and what an emotional and moving day it was. To see that great swarm of people--estimates I've heard say about 2 million, possibly more--full of joy and jubulation over seeing history being made, and all of us watching from work or home, sharing in the hope that this will be the beginning of a brighter day for us all.

I heard on CNN that not one arrest took place. How many times can you get 2 million people together in the freezing cold, standing and sitting for hours, and not have someone get a little out of hand. What a great testament to everyone involved. And I hope that this will encourage more people to visit our capital and take advantage of all the great things it has to offer.

I thought Obama's speech was good; people were grousing a bit that he wasn't specific about plans and what our responsibilities as citizens will be. But I thought it was plain speaking, pragmatic, and set the scene for future speeches and plans that will spell out specifics.

Of course, I was wrong about the dress color, which I predicted would be subdued and blue (Malia actually wore blue). Michelle's dress was nice and appropriate for the weather, and she was very brave going sans winter coat. But the teal colored shoes and greenish-yellow gloves were a bit of a head scratcher for me.

The Inauguration gown I liked more. It was pretty and feminine and reminded me of the Grecian gowns Jackie Kennedy favored. When I first saw the dress, I thought it might have been made by Carolina Herrerra. She designed Caroline Kennedy's wedding gown, which had very similiar applique work. But it's actually Jason Wu, a 26-year old designer. What a coup for him to have his design chosen.

While many of us watched the ceremonies and celebrations today, I know one lady that did not. Her name is Dee, and she is coordinator at the Food Pantry on 36th Street in Lawrenceville. Her days have been busier lately, she told me, because more people are out of work and it's getting harder for everyone to make ends meet. During the speeches and the swearing ins, she was at her job as usual, quietly passing out food, encouraging everyone to take a sack of potatoes, and some fresh green beans, too, along with the bulging bags of groceries already assembled for patrons.

Dee is one of those unsung heroes from my neighborhood, laboring with quiet dignity to try to make people's lives a little bit easier (myself included). My wish is that come next Inauguration Day, Dee will be working somewhere else, because by then the need for food pantries will have all but vanished. An unrealistic wish, I know, but wouldn't that be great?

Quinoa and Sacred Ground

2009-01-19T11:59:00.009-05:00

Part I: "You say Knee-Wha, I say Quinoa"

Quick - name a staple that's always in your pantry. Although the quantity of items in my pantry always pales in comparison to that of my parents' (which I affectionately refer to as the Bomb Shelter--you know where I'll be headed in the event of a nuclear disaster), those new kitchen cabinets (right) allow for much more room for the staples on my list: mac & cheese, brownie mix, and Chef Boyardee Mini-Ravioli's.

China Millman (surely this is a pseudonym and not her actual name), Restaurant Critic of the venerable Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, seems to philosophically disagree with my offerings and came up with a list of her own. It includes, amongst other things, salumi, quinoa, and sriracha hot sauce. You can see the article with the complete list here.

I am by no means a gourmand, but it's pretty sad when I have to go on the Internet to figure out what half the items were (salumi, in case you were wondering, is an "artisan cured meat"). Quinoa I did know as a grain associated with Native Americans, although I did not know it was pronounced "Knee-wha", until my friend Nut Bar (not his real name) happily corrected my mispronunciation.

I'm sorry if I disappoint Miss China, but while I may indulge in some quinoa, bulgur, cous cous, or similar in a restaurant, I won't be stocking my pantry with some any time soon. I am many things, but Martha Stewart I am not.

Part II: Plans for Sacred Grounds Grounded

With leads me to Part II of this blog, Sacred Ground. You might remember ever since Flight 93 crashed on 9/11 in a field in rural Pennsylvania, there has been an effort afoot to build a memorial there.

Well, it seems that the owner of that parcel of land, Mike Svonavec, has lawyered up, gotten himself incorporated, and wants what he considers to be "fair compensation" for the land, and I'm assuming an associated Right of Way to build/access a road to the memorial site. His idea of fair compensation is -- are your ready for this? -- $10 million dollars. Unless he was raising chickens on that land that laid golden eggs, I'd say he's trying to capitalize on what was one of the darkest days in American history.

But, hey, that's just my opinion. If you'd like to tell Mike what you think, you can: just look him up on switchboard.com -- his address and phone are right there. I told Nut Bar this story, and he suggested Eminent Domain, which I think is a stellar idea. I'm all for compensating the guy for people tromping through his property, but asking $10 million? That's my definition of chutzpah.

Welcome to My Blog!

2009-01-19T00:26:00.001-05:00

And Happy Inauguration Eve! All I can say is, it's about bloody time - and boy, am I glad I don't live in DC at the moment. If I did, I'd rent my house/apartment for an obscene amount of money, get on the first flight to Barbados and start sipping rum at this beach (lovely Miami Beach) while everyone in DC was a) fighting traffic and tourists, b) standing in the freezing cold, then c) realizing that while standing at the mall is historic and all that, the best seat is probably plopped in front of the tv in your warm and cozy home.

But since I don't live in DC, of course this is all a moot point. And while I'll be at my house in Pittsburgh, it won't be warm and cozy, but being unemployed means I can plop down in front of the tv and watch history in the making.

Any guesses what Miss Michelle will be wearing? My guess is blue and simple. She seems to like to wear bright colors (love that J. Crew ensemble she wore on the chat shows) but I think that since she (sorta) wore red on election night, it will be a semi-subdued blue for inauguration day. Anyone else have any predictions?